A Hole in the Plan | Critical Role | Campaign 2, Episode 42

A Hole in the Plan | Critical Role | Campaign 2, Episode 42

MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight’s
episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play
Dungeons & Dragons. Before we dive into tonight’s episode, we have some announcements to get
through, so hang tight for just a moment. We have two fantastic sponsors for tonight’s episode, the
first, of course, our fantastic returning friends and allies in this Campaign Two: D&D Beyond. Sam? SAM: D&D Beyond, everybody. It’s almost
Thanksgiving time and I thought, what better for us to do than to thank our long-time sponsor D&D
Beyond. They’ve been with us all campaign, we hope into the next year, so as a token of our
appreciation, we put together a highlight reel of all my best moments from all the best D&D Beyond
ads of the year, so roll that clip, gentlemen, and we’re going to– Hold on. I’ve just been handed
something. Okay. I’m being told that we don’t have that clip, which is disappointing because we had
meetings about this all week, I talked to editors about this, and this was important to me, and to–
Okay, sorry. Okay, I’m being told that we did not have meetings all week about this, and this is a
bit that I wrote about an hour ago. Needless to say, I feel like D&D Beyond is going to not like
this because we’ve taken them on this rollercoaster of emotions now, and they’re going
to be pretty pissed off, they may pull their sponsorship dollars– Okay, now I’m being told
that no, they will not pull their sponsorship dollars because they really just want me to read
the ad copy that they provided me two days ago. So I’ll just read that now, and they’ll be happy. As
a reminder from last week, Dungeon of the Mad Mage and the Magic: The Gathering D&D crossover,
Guildmaster’s Guide to Ravnica, are available now in the D&D Beyond marketplace. Be sure to pick up
yours at dndbeyond.com/marketplace. Okay, fine, so maybe they’re a great company, but I feel like
they’re going to resent me for– I am being told that no, they’re not going to resent me at all,
and in fact they have a promo code named after me. The promo code is “SamIsOurHero”– not case
sensitive– it can be used right now for 25% off all digital books, including those two books I
just mentioned earlier, so go to the store right now and use it. Okay, forget about D&D Beyond, all
right? The fans will be pissed off at me, right? They will think that I’m an awful human being,
they’ll drag my name on Reddit– I’m being told now that there’s nothing written on any of these
pieces of paper, and this is just a thinly-veiled attempt to get attention to myself because I am
very insecure, I have these deep-seated problems, and– I’m being told now that I’m actually pretty
happy, and I don’t have any deep-seated depression or anything like that, and I’m a pretty good guy.
Wow, I really think, guys, that this bit has been a journey for all of us, and I feel like we’ve all
learned something about ourselves, and about– Nope, I’m being told we have not learned anything,
and that I’m to wrap it up, so back to you, Matt! MATT: Thank you, Sam. TRAVIS: We’re going to recycle all those papers,
right? MATT: Yes. May you enjoy your ever-future in race
car beds. Thank you, D&D Beyond, for being our friends and allies in this. Our secondary sponsor
tonight is the fantastic company Thinkfun’s Shadows in the Forest game. For those who haven’t
seen it, this is the reimagining of the classic game Waldschattenspiel– I know I pronounced it
terribly– but Thinkfun licensed it, maybe. Shadows in the Forest is the only collaborative
board game that you actually play in the dark. In the game you play as Shadowlings, they’re these
scattered gnomish-like creatures that hide in the shadows and live in the forest, and it’s really
cool. You all have to work together to try and meet under a singular tree on the board while one
of the players plays as a lantern, an actual physical lantern that gives off light, and so you
can only move within the shadows, and if the player moves the light– SAM: That sounds awesome! MATT: It’s really cool. TALIESIN: I brought a copy, actually, I forgot to
bring it out onto the table, but I have a copy that we’ll probably play. MATT: It’s really cool, because if you’re playing
one of the shadows and you’re caught in the light, you can’t move, and if the person who’s playing
the light manages to catch all the Shadowlings in the light, they win, but if all the Shadowlings
manage to meet under there– It actually uses– MARISHA: They did a creepy animation for a promo
that’s during the break. TALIESIN: It’s got little stand-up trees, and the
little creatures are very Miyazaki-looking, and the whole thing’s got a very Candyland for goth
kids vibe. The dice glow, which I also think is really cool. MATT: It’s pretty fun. So you can check it out on
Amazon, and it’s currently at 20% off there for a limited time, so make sure to pick up your copy
now if you plan to. It is Shadows in the Forest, and it is awesome and I’m really excited to try it
out. Next up, lets see, Travis do you want to go ahead and talk a little bit about Operation Supply
Drop? TRAVIS: Yes! Operation Supply Drop is my charity
that we are supporting this November in honor of Veterans Day. OSD is an amazing charity. They’ve
helped over 750,000 members of the military community. In active service, in their transition
back to civilian life, they help the families of the people that have served. These guys are so
great. They have skill fairs, they help people with job training, resumes, anything that’ll take
them from being a military back into the real world. To me, it’s so personal. My family has been
in the military for, oh god, decades. So if you can, share with your friends and family, give a
little love. Everything you need to know about the charity, or just donate, is at critrole.com/osd. MATT: Thank you guys for your amazing support of
this initiative. It’s been awesome to watch all the Critters come together to help support our
troops there. It’s been awesome. We also have a bunch of new live content coming to our Critical
Role Twitch stream in the next few weeks, including the season finale of All Work No Play. SAM: That’s tomorrow. LAURA: Oh my goodness! MATT: Yeah. I’ve seen clips and I’m already pretty
excited. LIAM: Very, very, very special. MARISHA: I’ve been doing this a while. It might be
the weirdest thing I’ve produced. It’s frickin weird. Yeah, whole thing’s bizarre. MATT: There’s also an all-honey Honey Heist coming
up. (cheering) MATT: All-honey Honey Heist. SAM: Is it all honey plus Brian Foster, or just
all honeys? MARISHA: Nope, just all honeys. SAM: Awesome. MARISHA: All the ladies. TRAVIS: Honey Heist! Honey, Honey Heist! MARISHA: Laura, of course, some old friends: Mary
Elizabeth and Noelle Stevenson SAM: Ooh! MARISHA: Some classics, yeah. LIAM: That’s some heavy She-Ra juice. TRAVIS: So much power at one table. Wow! MARISHA: As well as the lovely Dani Carr that we
all know and love. The lovely Brittany Walloch from All Work No Play fame. SAM: I’ve heard of them. MARISHA: Who else am I missing, huh? MATT: Isn’t Krystina playing? MARISHA: Oh and Krystina Arielle from Sirens of
the Realms. TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah! MARISHA: Full house. MATT: Going to be a lot of fun, so check it out.
We also have Sam’s Pablove fireside chat coming up soon. SAM: Oh that’s right, I have to do a fireside
chat. MATT: Yeah, you do. TRAVIS: Are you doing that in a speedo, or what? LIAM: No, he promised to free-ball it. TRAVIS: What? Amazing! SAM: Okay. Uh-huh. MATT: And much more. Go to critrole.com for
details of all these fantastic shows that are coming up in the next couple of weeks. We’ll have
more updates as far as our content schedule as it comes. Also, our second art book, as you
mentioned, Chronicles of Exandria Volume II: Legend of the Vox Machina is available for
pre-order at the shop at shop.critrole.com and shop.critrole.co.uk for our UK and surrounding
European brethren. An important note, if you do not reside in the UK or the US: you may want to
check both stores to see which is most cost effective to ship from. It just happens to be
wibbly-wobbly shipping stuff. Huge thanks to all of you for your fantastic support, for all the
fantastic artists, and the fantastic community. This is a big love letter to the end of last
campaign, and each of you having something really special to come to make this a memorable keepsake
for all of us. So thank you. As a reminder, there will not be an episode of Critical Role next week
because it’s Thursday November 22nd, which is Thanksgiving here in the US. TRAVIS: Going to eat food! MATT: Yep, I know. We will be enjoying time off
with our family and friends, but we will be thinking of you guys in the meantime and we will
be back the week after that. So there’ll be a one week break, we’ll see you in two weeks after
tonight’s episode. I believe those are all– LAURA: I got something! MATT: Oh! Sneaky Laura! LAURA: No, it’s not on the thing, but I have it
anyway. Are you wearing it? MARISHA: Yes, I am! LAURA: We have our hoodies, back in stock in
shop.critrole.com. It’s new and improved. Yeah, 2.0. This really awesome text was hand
calligraphed? Calli– how do you say it? TALIESIN: Calligraphed. LAURA: Did I say it right? By Chris Gladis and
then we turned it into this graphic, and so it’s really gorgeous. MATT: Critter calligraphed. LAURA: Yes! And it’s super soft still. MARISHA: It’s so nice! LAURA: Then the other thing that’s in the store
now that we didn’t tell you guys about ahead of time is something I’m very excited about. We have
baby onesies! There’s not a ton of them because how many Critter babies are there? TRAVIS: Thousands! LAURA: I designed this one, it says, “I wanna be a
monstah!” MARISHA: Look at the little rattle mace! LAURA: It’s got a mace rattle! MATT: Also viable for our really small critters,
too. I think Sam will fit in one. TRAVIS: We will certainly try. MATT: In fact for the fireside chat we could– SAM: Oh, maybe I can just wear that. That’s a good
idea. MATT: Well, thank you, Laura. With that, my
friends, I think tonight, it’s time to dive into our episode of Critical Role. [TV static, click] [groovy Critical Role theme] MATT: And welcome back. Wow. You guys are ever
creative. Last we left off. The Mighty Nein– Garbage wine? LIAM: Garbage wine. SAM: Water. MATT: The Mighty Nein had made their way to the
Menagerie Coast, got swept up in a bunch of chaos, and found themselves out at sea, amongst the
Swavain Islands, taken in by a pirate crew, captained by Captain Avantika, basically at threat
of death otherwise. Sent to an island to investigate a temple, learn about seals that
possibly are keeping your patron, Uk’otoa, at bay. Made your way back across the Lucidian Ocean,
towards the city of Darktow. Actually actively partook in some piracy. SAM: Yeah. TRAVIS: Polite piracy MATT: Polite piracy. Sure. TALIESIN: You got a participant trophy. MATT: Whatever it takes to help you sleep at
night. And found yourselves at the pirate city of Darktow, surrounded by the Dragshallow Reef. Where
you had just arrived, with both ships, the Squalleater and The Mistake. The crew you had
hired out of Nicodranas, looking very confused and concerned at their current fate, given the fact
they were just hired hands at sea. You were ushered up along the sheer cliffs alongside
Darktow Isle, a long stone shelf within the cavern where the Plank King himself greeted you, bid you
entry to the Revelry, this extending band of pirates across this part of the ocean. Laid some
ground rules and sent you on your way. And that is where we left off. Mighty Nein, as you descend the
rain-covered stone steps that descend down the side of the cliffs– how’s that for alliteration
in a phrase? Making your way towards the now-darkened evening city of Darktow, the distant
glimmers of interior firelight slightly emanating from open windows. You can see folks walking
through town, the light drizzle threatening to stifle the low torchlight being carried from
location to location. You can see the outline of dozens of ships that are locked into the shipyard
that surrounds the city, as well as the crooked outline of nearby barricades set up across the
reefs that surround the island. Avantika proceeds before you. What would you like to do? SAM: (whispers) Shoot her in the back of the
head. LAURA: (whispers) We could totally push her off
the cliff right now. SAM: Oh! MARISHA: (whispers) Uk’otoa. TRAVIS: Yeah, so, the group is us plus Avantika
and– MARISHA: Her crew? MATT: No, just Avantika. Her crew went to The
Bloated Cup, which is a tavern. MARISHA: And we’re headed there. MATT: Correct. You assume you’re headed back
there. LIAM: Pirate on pirate violence is verboten. LAURA: She just slipped. LIAM: That’s true. SAM: I saw it. MARISHA: She fell down the stairs, you guys. TRAVIS: Night time, right? Sun has gone down? MATT: Correct. TRAVIS: Okay. MARISHA: I catch up to her a little bit. Hey,
Avantika. MATT: “Yes?” MARISHA: Weird question. MATT: “Possibly a weird answer.” MARISHA: How much do you know– How do you know
how to give a certain amount to Avantika? Sorry, the Plank King. Freudian slip. MATT: “Well, when we return into the bay, we are
to essentially give the materials, or at least a “number of what we’ve managed to acquire. We are
supposed to, essentially– what is the word I’m “looking for? What is the word I’m looking for?” SAM: Tithe? MATT: Tithe, I would say– You’re going through
customs and you have to– ALL: Declare. MATT: Declare, thank you. “You must declare the
amount of which you have recently come upon, and “from that there is a tithe offer to the Plank
King, roughly about 25-30%. But we do not pay for “our ship repairs, we have free asylum here within
the island, and we are under the strict law that “if anyone double-crosses anyone else within the
bounds of the city, they will have the hammer of “the Plank King down upon them.” MARISHA: It’s very intense. MATT: “That is the way of life.” MARISHA: So it’s less like a government and more
of a union that you buy into? MATT: “More or less, yes. They’re not much into
governing, more just–” MARISHA: Like a union with a dictator? MATT: “A union with a very hard-headed and
forthright union leader.” MARISHA: “Hmm. Do you ever think you could make a
good union leader?” MATT: “Nah. I have my own specific interests,
they’re much more narrow.” MARISHA: Huh. MATT: “Why, do you have aspirations?” MARISHA: No. MATT: “I didn’t think so.” MARISHA: Who needs aspirations? MATT: “Well, some of us do. There has to be more
to you than just this “contradictory-for-the-sake-of-being-contradictory
aspect, eh?” MARISHA: I would love for you to tell me about it
someday. MATT: “Come, let’s have a drink, huh? First
round’s on me.” MARISHA: Deal. SAM: (singing) Everyone’s fucking Avantika! LIAM: You are going to judge me for finger
motions? Hold on, everybody, stop the game. Laura Bailey just shamed me for a sexual finger motion,
at this table, after three and a half motherfucking years! I have seen everything!
Resume the game. TRAVIS: Avantika is the Infinity Gauntlet and she
has one stone. (laughter) TRAVIS: Or does she? MATT: Well, she lost a stone, technically. TALIESIN: Well. We should take a look around,
maybe get a sense of this place, since we’re going to be here for a while when they fix the ship. I
have a few things I’m looking for. MARISHA: Might as well go to the pub. TALIESIN: We could do that, sure, I guess. MARISHA: First drink’s on her. LAURA: I think that guy was wearing a wig. SAM: Oh yes, he did have a weird hairline, right? LAURA: Yeah, it was a really bad-made wig. I mean,
the hair looked good, but it was really obvious. SAM: Maybe that’s in fashion here, maybe we should
all go wig shopping. LAURA: Ooh! SAM: Just saying. TRAVIS: Captain, how did the current Plank King
get to the position that he holds now, do you know? MATT: “As far as I have been told, at the very
least– this was before my time joining the “Revelry– there was a disagreement, and the
previous Plank King seemed to be in the minority “of the side of this disagreement, and the current
Plank King was in the majority. So they stormed “the caverns of the previous Plank King, and tossed
most of his corpse to the rocks below.” TRAVIS: A little mutiny, eh? Did– Hmm.
Interesting. No, that’s all. MATT: “To his credit, the current Plank King has
done a very fine job of maintaining organization “in the Revelry.” TRAVIS: That’s what I was going to ask: if you
were a fan or not. MATT: “He doesn’t bother me, he leaves us well
enough alone, we follow the rules, we maintain “all of the benefits of being under the banner, and
I’m left to my own devices.” TRAVIS: Any foes of yours in this Darktow? Anyone
we should look out for? MATT: “There are a number of unsavory types, but
I’ve made a bit of a reputation of being a “little– eh? People don’t like to tangle with that
too much, eh?” TRAVIS: Yeah, why would you get wrapped up in
that? Yeah, let’s go grab a drink. MARISHA and SAM: Mm-hmm. LAURA: How long have you been a pirate? MATT: “Let’s see. Open on the seas? About 12, 13
years.” LAURA: Whoa! LIAM: How did you fall into it? MATT: “I got sick of following somebody else’s
orders.” LIAM: Where do you hail from? MATT: “I’ll tell you over drinks. This is not the
best place to have these discussions, eh? Perhaps “after a few rounds. Come! To The Bloated Cup!” SAM: The Bloated Cup. TRAVIS: Yep. We go. MATT: As you guys finish descending the stairs
into the city itself, you catch there are quite a few patrols through the city. You can see the
torchlight being held by each as they make their way, just keeping an eye out. You get the sense
that there’s probably quite a number of volunteers, or at least individuals, that are
intent on maintaining the semblance of civility here within Darktow itself. Leading close towards
The Bloated Cup, it’s not that far from where you had set your ship within the shipyard. It’s a
fairly large two-story tavern, very wide across its bottom, and seems to be at least one of maybe
two social gathering sites here within the city, once the sun goes down. Three blocks away, you can
already hear the music, chatter, laughter, and yelling. As you approach closer, begin to look
from the outside in, the warm light and the movement of shadows across the open windows shows
you that the place is pretty jam-packed. As you begin to make your way into, following Avantika,
to the interior, you hear the shouting and burbling and clinking of glasses as the far corner
has five or six individuals. You’re not sure if they’re paid musicians, or just sailors who happen
to have a bit of experience with a fiddle, a drum, and a flute of some kind. As the music begins to
play, you can see there is one table that has a lot of Avantika’s crew. They’ve pushed a bunch of
chairs clammed together– clammed?– crammed together with some bits of dried bread and
somewhat soft fruit, some cheeses laid out, and two large pitchers of ale already waiting at the
get-go. Right off from them, you see a smaller table with everyone you’ve hired from The Mistake,
including Orly, all sitting there clutching their glasses looking around scared shitless. As soon as
you enter, their eyes turn to you and they go– (laughter) TRAVIS: They do that cafeteria thing, “Hey! Hey,
you want to sit? Over here?” MATT: At which point Avantika goes, “Come! Have a
seat!” and pushes one of the other tables out of the way of a few other people that are already
sitting at it. She takes her hand and scoots it across the table and they both go, (annoyed
grunt), and spit on the ground and get up and move away. Immediately you get the sense that there is
a power dynamic. Avantika seems to have at least some modicum of respect amongst the rest of the
riff-raff within this tavern. TALIESIN: She’s a Heather. MARISHA: (knowing laugh) MATT: Pushing the tables together, kicking a
couple of the stools over, it looks like there’s enough spots at the table for most of you. One or
two of you might have to stand or find a place next to the rest of your hired help. TALIESIN: I’ll stand. LAURA: I’ll stand, too. MATT: As you guys all sit down, drinks and rounds
begin to be passed to each of you, conversations already mid-discussing. You hear bits and pieces
about how, “the blessing of the Serpent has been “upon us this past month.” Being on the ship with
most of the crew, they haven’t been terribly social with you. They’ve helped you and guided you
in learning a few things, but there’s still very much this separation and attention that you’re the
newcomers, and a strange, new shiny thing in their captain’s eye. This is the first time you’ve seen
them a little bit three sheets to the wind as a group, and they’re talking openly. Avantika has a
definite zealotry to her, but you start noticing members of the crew and why they are with her or,
at least, now that they’ve been there, they’ve also bought into these tales of Uk’otoa. You get
the sense that they believe that this path that she’s following will lead to her success and, by
default, probably their success. TALIESIN: How many of them are true believers?
Give or take? MATT: Make an insight check for me. TRAVIS: You’re no good at those, right? TALIESIN: I’m terrible at these. TRAVIS: I want to know what blood type they are. TALIESIN: 26 MATT: Okay, that’ll do. That’ll, yeah. Okay. You
get the sense that Vera, who’s the older human, the tough-looking woman who was her quartermaster
before it was passed to Fjord, is definitely the most invested in this idea, this spiritual journey
they’re all embarking on with captain at the helm. You also feel that Ipess, who’s the gnome second
mate that you’ve encountered previously, in a very similar way is completely invested, eyes wide. His
general banter tends to be a little crazed and sporadic, but whenever they’re talking about the
Great Serpent, now with phrasing of “The Leviathan” as the title has become more prominent with
discovery, there’s a reverence to his eyes and an attentiveness that is out of character for him. So
you mark Vera and Ipess as two very intent believers, behind Avantika. TALIESIN: Is there anybody who’s awkwardly into
it, but definitely would probably walk away if they could? Is there anybody who’s a little– MATT: You get the sense that Bouldergut, the ogre,
half-understands it and is more just excited because everyone else is excited. It’s like a dog
that gets really wound up when everyone around is talking loud. That’s Bouldergut. A number of the
deckhands appear to be invested, but they’re less intensely driven and more just excited that their
captain’s excited and maybe starting to consider that there is something to this now that they’ve
seen the things they’ve seen, and the powers that she’s acquired. That’s a good spread of what
you’ve managed to gather. TALIESIN: That’ll do. TRAVIS: I’ll grab a drink and I’ll head over to
where Vera’s sitting. MATT: Okay. Vera is sitting directly to the right
of Avantika, and there’s not much space to sit next to her, but you could grab a stool and
squeeze in to her right side. TRAVIS: Yeah, I’ll take a drink and I’ll plop it
down right in front of her and I’ll take a knee on the floor, so I’m kneeling next to her on the
other side of Avantika. I’ll say: Hey listen, no hard feelings, right? MATT: “There is no hard feelings. I understand the
reasoning, and the captain’s word is law. I am “excited to see the great things you accomplish as
the quartermaster of our ship.” TRAVIS: Right, whatever’s best for the ship. MATT: “Precisely, and for the captain.” TRAVIS: Well, I feel the presence of Uk’otoa
smiling on all of us and I know that our partnership here will be a beneficial one. MATT: “I can only agree.” TRAVIS: Well, this has been fun. If you need
anything, as your quartermaster, you just let me know. MATT: “Aye aye. Captain.” Looks to Avantika.
Avantika right now is deep in the cups. At this point, a figure turns around the corner. You see a
male gnome: short, maybe in his 40s or so with spiked hair. It’s thinning on the top, but you can
see he’s taken thick balms of some kind to try and make it look intensely young, and failing halfway.
Big mutton chops that come down to a very pointed chin, and he’s dressed in fairly decent clothing,
a nice silk vest with billowing sleeves out of his shirt, with some bangles that clink around his
wrists. He comes and finds you on the opposite side and looks across to Avantika grinning. He
goes, “Well well well, it’s been a while since “we’ve seen you ’round here!” She turns to him and
goes, “Ah, Sorris! You’re back from that fool’s “errand, I see. How was the Shattered Teeth?” He
goes, “Eh, foggy and cold as shit. How goes your “cloud-chasing journeys, love?” She goes, “Grand!
We might have scored a fine shipwreck, and a “promise of salvage, eh?” Looks back to him. “You
up for hire, perhaps?” He goes, “Eh, tempting but, “nah. I’m still fresh off the water, want to enjoy
myself a while.” She’s like, “All right, very “well, we’ll be in port for a day or two while we
get some repairs done. If you change your mind, “well, just start shouting. I’m sure we’ll find
your annoying voice easy enough.” He goes, “(giggles) Sure that is, eh? You’re all new ’round
here.” LAURA: Arr! SAM: Yeah, we’re new pirates. Are you a pirate? I
mean, I guess we’re all pirates, right? Everyone’s a pirate here? MATT: “At the moment, no. At the moment I’m a
civilian, and a drunkard.” SAM: Oh! TALIESIN: Shattered Teeth, what’s the Shattered
Teeth? Did your teeth shatter? Is that a place? MATT: “No, it’s a series of islands to the south
of here.” TALIESIN: Oh. LAURA: We know that because we’re pirates too, and
we know those things. TALIESIN: I could fill a book with what I don’t
know. TRAVIS: Sorry, I didn’t catch your name, it
was–? MATT: “Sorris. Sorris Kay. What’s your name?” TRAVIS: Oh, I’m Fjord. Nice to meet you. MATT: “Fjord? All right.” SAM: Are you a captain, or do you do something
else that’s more specialized? MATT: “Me? No, I’m a sniper.” SAM: A sniper? LIAM: What do you snipe with? MATT: “Things. Why are you so curious?” LIAM: You’re an interesting fellow. MATT: “Speak for yourself, sir. What’s your
name?” LIAM: My name is Phillip. MATT: Make a deception check. SAM: Name check! TRAVIS: Strong name. LIAM: What is that? I don’t have my contacts in. I
can barely see it. That’s 11, right? So that is 17. MATT: He goes, “Okay, Phillip, and what’s your
specialty? What do you bring to the crew?” LIAM: Oh, I am a navigator. Newer, but eager and
looking forward to plying my trade. SAM: Quick, Phillip, which way’s north? LIAM: It’s right that way. SAM: That’s amazing! MATT: “That’s actually pretty good!” SAM: You can spin him. Here! I’m going to spin him
around a couple times. Now which way’s north? LIAM: It’s still over toward the hallway over
there. SAM: Wow, right? MATT: “That’s pretty good. Me, I’ve got a few odds
and things, mainly with a longbow. Good shot “there, but an eye that can see things on the
horizon, mainly live up in the crow’s nest, you “know? Keep an eye out.” LIAM: You know, this is our first time on these
islands and I don’t know much about it at all. Is there any legal system here? Do you know what I
mean? Or is it just, you know– (gunshots) MATT: “He’s joking, right?” Avantika goes, “I’m
afraid not. His bailiwick, apparently, is being “curious and clueless.” LIAM: I am a big reader and there is a lot I don’t
know, like my tall friend over here. I mean, there must be trouble that breaks out. There must be bar
fights. MATT: “Of course, bar fights are fun. That’s part
of the reason we live here!” LIAM: Well, I can see the appeal, but what happens
if there’s something risky or it causes theft of property for someone important? MATT: “If it’s a member of the Revelry thieving
from another member of the Revelry, and it gets found out, it’s brought to Plank King. Plank King
makes a judgment, based on that, some sort of reparations or– (thud, screaming, impacts)” LIAM: So Plank King is the law? MATT: “More or less.” LIAM: That’s biblical. LAURA: But you can still fight other people? For
fun? MATT: “Why? You looking for a fight?” LAURA: Are you looking for a fight? MATT: “Always.” SAM: Don’t fight each other! LAURA: Why? SAM: Because that’s crazy. MATT: “I never throw the first punch, so anytime.”
He taps the side of one of his jowls. You hear the ruffle of his fingers through his somewhat curled
muttonchop on the side. MARISHA: Do it! MATT: Grabs a drink and without breaking eye
contact– TRAVIS: We just got here. SAM: Why? Why would you do this? MARISHA: I’m the worst influence. I’m going to say
do it. LIAM: We are trying to get the lay of the land
here. LAURA: Tusktooth? TRAVIS: (gulping) LAURA: I punch him in the chin! MATT: Roll an attack. TALIESIN: You didn’t even ask him if there’s a
bookshop nearby. LIAM: Might have gotten to that, perhaps. LAURA: Unarmed strike! 14? No, 15. MATT: 15 hits. You do one point of damage plus
your strength modifier. LAURA: Four points of damage! MATT: Boom, right across his chin. He falls to the
ground, turns around, rubs his chin. “That was a surprising bit of power there for someone your
size. Come at me!” He dives at you. Roll initiative. MARISHA: Yes! LAURA: 16. MATT: Oh, he beats you at a 17. 15 plus two. For a
small size, he is quick and he jukes to one side, turns around, and goes for a haymaker to the side
of your face! That’s cocked. That’s a 14 to hit. LAURA: Oh, I turn and he hits my shield. MATT: Ping! “Ah!” LAURA: I swipe at him with my tail and try to trip
him. MATT: Go for it. Make another attack roll. LAURA: 19! MATT: Are you just doing damage or are you trying
to shove him and knock him prone? LAURA: Just knock him prone. MATT: Okay, that’s your athletics check,
actually. LAURA: Oh, okay, so I would add 13 plus
athletics. MATT: He’s going to make his acrobatics to try and
dodge. LAURA: 16. MATT: Natural 19. He manages to leap in the air
and your tail hits the side of the table and (thudding) to one side. The drinks begin to spill
and one reaches out and grabs them, prevents them from being knocked over. TRAVIS: We’re all grabbing our drinks and standing
up. LAURA: Wow, you’re quick! MATT: As soon as you turn back and say that, you
look and he’s not anywhere to be seen. Then you hear this (footsteps) under the table. You glance
down as you watch him leaping up from between your legs and the table to uppercut you right in the
chin. That’s 18 to hit. LAURA: I’m 18. MATT: He just manages to hit you! You take three
points of damage. Crack! Right from underneath the chin, you feel your jaw clink into your teeth,
there’s a horrible screeching sound. It hurts. You can feel the numbness in your face from the
impact. After he hits you, he darts off around from behind and he’s probably going to go in for a
hold, but you have your go. LAURA: Okay, I’m going to reach out and try to
punch him in the back of the head. MATT: Go for it. SAM: Inelegant, but perfect. LAURA: Oh no. Natural one. MATT: You go to swing for his head and he grabs
your hand and goes, “Ah-ah-ah.” He goes to pull you forward to go for a headbutt. MATT: That’s a 19 to hit! LAURA: Fuck me. MATT: Crack! Right in the front of the forehead
and the nose, you can immediately feel the blood beginning to pour from underneath. SAM: Crikey. MATT: Behind, you guys watch the crowd. A lot of
people’s attention have turned to this bar fight. A few of them are now backing up and getting their
drinks, ready to watch. Somebody else at the table goes (impacts) and punches somebody else and
starts another aspect, and now there’s another bar fight beginning down the side corner. It’s your
go. Oh, wait. Yeah, because he finished the heatbutt, so you go. LAURA: How much damage was that? MATT: Three points of damage. Every time you get
hit, he does three points. LAURA: Okay, okay, okay. Oh, no, should I be mean? TRAVIS: “Should I be mean?” LAURA: I’m going to grab him after he hits my head
and I’m going to try to knee him. MATT: Okay, go for it. Roll for an attack. LAURA: That’s good, that’s 23. MATT: Yeah, that definitely hits. LAURA: Four points of damage right between the
legs. MATT: Another four points there. All right. “Ugh!”
His eyes squint and roll backwards a bit and he goes down into a crouching position. (grunting)
Rights himself in almost a Muay Thai stance. LAURA: Below the belt. MATT: Yeah, that’s 11. He tries to swing and you
parry it off to the side without an issue. Go ahead and retort. LAURA: I’m going to grab his wrist and try to spin
him around. MATT: Go for it. LAURA: 16. MATT: 16 hits! LAURA: Yeah! I’m going to grab him and try to grab
both of his arms and hold him on to me. MATT: Because you’re grappling? LAURA: Yeah. MATT: Roll again for your athletics. LAURA: Oh no, that was really bad. Five. MATT: He rolled a natural one. Literally a natural
one. He tries to squeeze out, but you’ve got a firm grip on his wrist and you pull him back in.
You’re now holding him to you; he’s grabbed. LAURA: Say uncle, say uncle! MATT: “No, never!” It’s his turn. He’s going to go
try to slam his head backwards into your face. Ooh, natural 18, that’s a 24. Take another three
points of damage. Crack! It hits you. For a second, you’re afraid it knocked a tooth out, but
you feel with your tongue and it’s still there. LAURA: Do I still have a hold of him? MATT: Yeah, he’s still grappled. LAURA: Ooh, ooh, I’m going to turn my head and try
to hit him with my horn. MATT: Ooh, nice, roll for an attack. LAURA: Oh, that was cocked. Crazy cocked. 19! MATT: 19 hits, takes another four damage. Crack!
It scrapes across his temple and it almost gouges an eye, and he turns and he’s like, “Ah! You’re
rambunctious, aren’t you?” He’s going to attempt to throw you off over his shoulder, pull you into
a roll. You get to make an athletics or acrobatics check against him as he tries to break from your
grapple. TRAVIS: I got one gold on the blue one. Anyone
want one gold on the blue one? LAURA: Oh no, six. SAM: I’ll take that bet! MATT: Breaks free and slams you onto your back.
You’re now prone from the reversal, but it’s your round, so you can get up or attack if you want
to. LAURA: Can I do a breakdancing move where I spin
around and jump up? Like Arya did in that episode of Game of Thrones. MATT: Sure, yeah. SAM: Who? Did you say Mario? LAURA: Arya. MARISHA: What’s Avantika doing? MATT: She’s drinking and watching. One leg up on
the table and she’s glancing over, watching this transpire. You’re going to sweep as you get up? LAURA: Yeah. MATT: Roll for attack. LAURA: 13. MATT: 13 does not hit. LAURA: No! MATT: You sweep and he leaps up and then, from the
air, tries to come down onto your leg with the full force of his tiny gnomish body. Natural 20. TRAVIS: (groaning) MATT: We’ll say for the purposes of this, because
the nature of the 20, we’ll make it double full damage, because it’s fist fights, that’s six
damage to you from that. Crack! The leg and the knee doesn’t dislocate or pop out, but you can
feel it get pushed to the limit and it hurts like a mother. Leaps up and like, “Not too bad! Come
on, bring it!” One eye’s a little bit– not swollen, but it’s starting to squint from pain.
Blood’s leaking out of his nose and his mouth and it’s smeared on one side of his cheek and he’s
(chuckling). LAURA: You’re crazy, Sorris. I like you. MATT: “I like you too–” LAURA: Boom! Right in the face. 16 to hit! MATT: 16 hits. That’s another four damage on him.
Crack, crack! This next series of hits come at him and he’s like, “Ha! Yeah, it’s nothing! I can take
it! Bring it!” He’s going to come forward and try do a series of pummeling in your direction.
Natural one. The sheer impact of the last blow seems to have knocked his block off, and he starts
doing this series of pummeling in the wrong direction, instead pushing toward Caduceus. He
moves out of the way. He batters at the side of his sleeve there and, “Ha! How’s that? Did I get
her? Wait.” Looks around and finds you. “Hi.” Your turn. LAURA: I’m going to say: All right, all right, all
right. We’re friends now, okay? Let’s not do any real damage to each other. I’m going to pat his
head and cast Cure Wounds. ALL: Aww. SAM: We’re awwing. TRAVIS: He’s on the edge, finish him! LAURA: I don’t want to knock him out, he’s cute.
1st-level. LIAM: You have mashed his hair spikes down. LAURA: That is six points of healing. TALIESIN: That’s two punches taken away. MATT: One and a half. LAURA: We’re friends now. MATT: He goes, “Huh. Thank you?” LAURA: You’re welcome. MATT: Make a persuasion check. LAURA: Oh no. Ooh, 21? MATT: He looks at you for a second. “Yeah. Good
point. I could’ve taken you anyway.” LAURA: Yeah, no. MATT: “We’ll pick this up another day.” LAURA: All right. Hey! I made a friend! SAM: Yes, you did. Good job, Jester! TRAVIS: Yeah, and you kept all your teeth. LAURA and MARISHA: Pirates! MATT: He comes up and goes for a handshake, grabs
your hand, pulls you and gives you a soft headbutt. It’s a little sore on both of you and
both of you wince. “Pleasure to meet you. What’s “your name?” LAURA: The Little Sapphire. That’s my pirate
name. MATT: “Okay. Sorris. Pleasure to meet you as
well.” As you guys are having this conversation, you hear behind you (grunting, crashing). Another
table behind is broken and you can see a person unconscious across the shattered pieces of wood,
arms curled in t-rex style. TRAVIS: Nott, unconscious person down. SAM: Ooh! I’m going to go steal from them. Oh,
wait, no, you can’t do that on this island. MARISHA: Is that Blues Traveler? SAM: It is the Traveler. MATT: The crowd goes, (cheering). Everyone who was
mildly disappointed at the lack of finale to your fight has now focused on the other one that has
completed with the smashing of furniture, the person on there left scrapped up and wrecked. The
other individual, one eye swollen shut, square-jawed, burly-looking guy going, “Yeah!”
Everyone cheers. TRAVIS: What’s the rest of Avantika’s crew doing?
Are they in the scrap as well? MATT: They’re just watching. The scrap was only
between two or three people, and one of them just went down. The other one called it off after that
and the declared winner everyone’s briefly focusing on. Then as fast as everyone cared,
everyone sat back down and they’re back to drinking. You get the sense in that moment this is
not a rare occurrence around here. TRAVIS: Hourly flare-up. TALIESIN: It’s like someone ordered a special at
an extremely expensive tiki bar. MARISHA and TALIESIN: Uk’otoa, Uk’otoa, Uk’otoa,
huh! TRAVIS: Wow, where the fuck did you guys just go?
I hope we’re going there after this show. TALIESIN and MARISHA: Go to Trader Sam’s. MARISHA: Where that mug came from! TALIESIN: That’s why I have my tiki mug today. LIAM: Caleb brings a big mug of ale and sits down
close to Avantika and says, over this din: This is a big longshot, but you seem very well-traveled
and well-researched. This place is crazy, but any place worth its salt has books. Why are you
laughing at me? Why are you laughing at me? Such a straightforward question. Well, I can tell from
your reaction that there is probably no good place to acquire a book, but you seem more educated than
the normal sort– or people around me– so perhaps you have a suggestion for a scholar lost at sea? MATT: “It is a very curious question. I imagine
there are probably some books. That wouldn’t be “what is commonly considered contraband or heavy
resale value. Most of the time when you are “boarding a ship, you leave the books behind. If
you’re looking for books, your best bet is to go “to the Sundry Square during the day.” LIAM: Sundry Square, during the day. MATT: “It’s about four blocks to the left after
you leave the outside of here, just outside of the “shipyard. It’s where all the awnings and ships
are.” LIAM: Should I be checking the trash bins for
these, then? Or do you think someone might actually have them for sale? MATT: “You can certainly ask around. Maybe both, I
don’t know.” LIAM: I’m jonesing pretty badly for a good book. TALIESIN: I’m looking for a blacksmith, actually,
as well. MATT: “That is possibly a few around, if I
recall.” TALIESIN: Somebody worth their salt, since “worth
your salt” is a really nice term. That’s great. Worth their salt. Somebody worth their salt. TRAVIS: Just taken with the saying? SAM: He’s going to use that a lot? That phrase? TALIESIN: It’s worth my salt. MARISHA: Caduceus, how much is salt worth to you?
Like on a scale of money to nothing? LIAM: Like a person’s worth. TALIESIN: Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t really
thought about it at all, now that I think about it. That’s a good question. I mean, there’s so
much salt around, to be fair. It would probably take a lot of salt to be worth something. MARISHA: Sure. TALIESIN: I mean, you could get it right out of
the water. TRAVIS: Yeah, it’s a fairly benign saying. Don’t
get too lost in it. TALIESIN: Everything is worth its salt at that
point, really. It’s a terrible currency. SAM: Did he drink a lot? TRAVIS: I was wondering how empty that cup is. TALIESIN: Has anyone been watching me drink? TRAVIS: I was going to ask. TALIESIN: I have been nursing the same cup the
entire time and have been fake-sipping it the entire night. I haven’t actually had a drop. TRAVIS: You had an ale or whatever everybody else
is drinking? TALIESIN: Whatever they handed me. I’ve been doing
this, to be fair, the entire time we’ve been together. MARISHA: He’s Bruce Wayne! Caduceus Wayne. TRAVIS: Caduceus Wayne? SAM and MARISHA: Caduce Wayne! MARISHA: I elbow Fjord and I sit down next to
Avantika. LIAM: Oh jeez, take my chair, fine. I’ll go get
another. MARISHA: Sorry, excuse me, sorry. So Avantika.
What’s next for The Squalleater? MATT: “Well,” and she sits, looks around everyone
at the table, and gestures for everyone to lean in a bit. “It looks like we are to, after a couple of
days of travel and supply-gathering, make our way “northward to a location that has been brought to
my attention by our quartermaster. There is a “likely chance that if there is some sort of
treasure there, it would be of importance to our “mission. However, it is a salvage mission, meaning
there will be some diving. So I am looking for a “few things to prepare for that so a few of us can
comfortably make our way beneath the waves.” SAM: Into the water? MATT: “Beneath the water, my friend.” SAM: Do cannon-folk typically go on those trips,
or do cannon-folk typically stay behind with the ship? TRAVIS: Gunner master, Nott, gunner master. SAM: Gunner master. MATT: “That is up to you. You are welcome to stay
behind. However, if things go correctly, I don’t “think there will be any worry of drowning.” SAM: Oh. How can you promise that? MATT: “Trust me. I have a few connections that owe
me a favor or two here on the island. Anyway, I “need a day to acquire what is necessary.
Nevertheless–” At this point she looks up at somebody past you and goes, “We’re having a
private discussion.” You turn and follow her eye line and you see a human female with curled blonde
hair. The curls have fallen in the moisture and the rain from the outside, dressed in a thick,
ragged, black coat, holding a cup, and she goes, “Aye, don’t worry about me. Just didn’t expect
this shore to drag you in quite so soon.” There’s a moment of tension. LAURA: Do we recognize her? MATT: No, you have not seen this figure before.
They both stare for a second, and she turns and walks off to a far table. TRAVIS: Was she directing that towards Avantika? MATT: Yeah. LAURA: Who was that? MARISHA: What? What did she say? Haven’t heard–
didn’t expect this– what? MATT: “Don’t mind her. It’s Allison; she’s–
what’s the word? A right cunt.” TALIESIN: Not Heather. Make a note. SAM: Friend of yours, or former friend? MATT: “Oh, best of friends. No, just a very nosy
co-thief at sea. Doesn’t know where to stop poking “where it doesn’t belong.” LIAM: Former business associate? MATT: “No, former competitor. Anyway.” MARISHA: I immediately grab my purse and hold onto
it. SAM: What purse? MARISHA: The thing I imagine most adventurers
have. A little coin satchel. SAM: Oh, but not like a cute little– MARISHA: No, not a Dolce & Gabbana, no. Not a Kate
Spade. TRAVIS: You mean a competitor in terms of sea
space, or in terms of your faith? MATT: “No, we’ve crossed territories once or
twice, and she has a habit of trying to embellish “truths to the Plank King. Anyway.” Hand me the
map, if you don’t mind. Oh, map’s here, actually. SAM: I knew someone like that once. They would
always go fishing and say that they caught something, but they never did. TALIESIN: A fisherman? SAM: Yes. MATT: Avantika lays a map out on the table. SAM: Ooh, we’ll put our weights down to weigh it
down. MARISHA: No, there was a discussion. It’s coming. LAURA: Oh, yeah. Coasters are not heavy enough. TALIESIN: Here’s a cube. Have a cube. MATT: A cube will do. TALIESIN: There’s a cube. SAM: There’s a cube. MATT: As Avantika points it out, she shows the
crew and says, “In two days travel, we will make “our way outside of the Dragshallow Reef, coasting
in northward for protection to about here. We “begin looking for our salvage.” At which point,
Orly, who’s glancing over the side, rubs his chin and goes, “Hmm. I don’t mean to question the
captain’s m-m-main objective; however, that looks “like it’s right around where the Diver’s Grave
m-m-may be.” TRAVIS: Diver’s Grave? MATT: She looks back and goes, “Perhaps, but does
it spook you? Do ghost stories make you shiver, “turtle boy?” Orly glances back at her with a
narrowed stare and goes, “As long as I’m staying “on the ship, I don’t m-m-mind.” He goes and sits
back down at the table. LAURA: Do divers die there? MATT: At this point, Sorris goes, “Oh, is that
where you’re going? You’re going over to the “Diver’s Grave?” TRAVIS: It would appear so, yeah. MATT: “Well, that’s certainly an off-limits
location for most salvaging, thanks to the cursed “woman, eh? Do you know much about your history?” TALIESIN: I’m hoping this is a place where
somebody named Rachel Diver may have bought a piece of land or something. MATT: “Close, but not at all.” MARISHA: Yeah, or Sophie. It’s always a Sophie. MATT: Make a history check. You can with
disadvantage, because of your lack of experience with the naval history. LAURA: Would I have heard ghost stories? MATT: You can make a history check as well. TRAVIS: 15. MATT: Okay. LAURA: 19! LIAM: 13. MATT: Doesn’t quite catch your attention. You’ve
heard mention of the Diver’s Grave, as it was a series of poems from a book you once read. The
thing that comes to mind is the name Dashilla. You instinctively mouth it– Dashilla– and he goes,
“Ah, Dashilla the Dreadful. You know about this one, eh?” LAURA: I mean, I read a poem about her. MATT: “Ah. Poem, I’ve not known, but maybe the
song you’ve heard.” Some of the crew around nod, remembering, and he goes and grabs his cup and
claps it twice to the table, and the crew begins to filter in as the song progresses, and he
goes– MARISHA: If there’s not 12 people that pop out
behind this curtain, I’m going to be disappointed. MATT: So he finishes the song. (laughter) TALIESIN: I was waiting for him to go, “Bill
Murray.” MATT: Sorris goes, (singing) “Where once the
waters rolled calmly by, where ocean’s heart did “sing, there stalked a lass with a hungry eye and
claws that grasp and wring. With lantern lure of a “glimmer pot, with treasure in her eyes, below they
swam to the gold they thought would await them as “their prize.” Everyone starts clamoring together
with the third verse, (singing) “Yet each of them “went to surely die, their graves to not be found.
For Dashilla and her hungry eye collects the lost “and drowned.” There’s a moment where they all
begin to clamor the drinks together and clink them and begin to drink them. (applause) TRAVIS: Yeah! That’s fortuitous. LAURA: Her hungry eye. TRAVIS: Her claws. MARISHA: Her lantern light. LAURA: Doesn’t she have a ring or something that
you said in the song? MARISHA: Yeah, I heard something about a ring, and
treasure in her eyes. MATT: He looks confused, “So you don’t know the
poem or the song.” LAURA: No, I know it, I just didn’t– I mean, I
read it like, one time, a long time ago. MATT: “Do you want a reprisal?” LAURA: Yeah. MATT: (clears throat, singing) “Where once the
waters rolled calmly by, where ocean’s heart did “sing. There stalked a lass with a hungry eye, and
claws that grasp and wring. With lantern lure of a “glimmer pot, with treasure in their eyes. Below
they swam to the gold they thought would await “them as their prize. Yet each of them went to
surely die, their graves to not be found. For “Dashilla and her hungry eye collects the lost and
drowned.” TRAVIS: Single eye, huh? TALIESIN: Damn! TRAVIS: Anyone else getting a bad feeling about
that? LAURA: No, why would you ever get a bad feeling
about that? SAM: (record scratching) Remix! TRAVIS: (low-pitched) Break it, break it, break it
down. LAURA: Her hungry eye. MATT: He goes, “But that’s just an old wives’
tale, you know? A myth.” TRAVIS: Sorris, is that somewhere you’ve been to?
You seem like a very fortune-seeking type. MATT: “Well, I sail over it, we just don’t really
salvage that.” TRAVIS: You don’t stop, either? MATT: “What?! In the middle of the ocean? Why?!
That’d be daft! Good luck.” Looks at Avantika, (singsong) “Good luck! With the missus,” and turns
around– SAM: With the missus? Oh. The lady– LAURA: Oh, Dashilla. MATT: You surmise that’s who he’s referring to.
Avantika goes, “Don’t pay him any mind. It is a “myth, and if it’s not, well, we just finished
tangling with a hydra and an entire island of snake “people. You’re not seriously worried about a
woman, eh?” LAURA: Well, we didn’t fight them under the water. LIAM: Yeah, I’m more concerned about the waves.
You have experience with this? Diving? MATT: “I should have an answer to at least most of
our troubles by the morrow. Just be patient.” LIAM: Yes or no question. TRAVIS: You know, most myths are based off of some
sort of fact. We don’t happen to know what the song thinks this dreadful creature is, do we? MATT: “Not any more than you would.” LAURA: She’s an underwater banshee. For sure! TRAVIS: Is that a thing? LAURA: Mm-hmm. Yeah. TRAVIS: You can’t really sing underwater, so how’s
that work? LAURA: It sounds a lot like glubby glubs. (underwater glubbing) TRAVIS: I love that everyone did that at the same
time. That’s all I needed. Well, great. We’ll find this solution to the diving in the morning, and
then in a day or two we’ll make our way? MATT: “That is the idea.” TRAVIS: Do you need any help securing this
solution? MATT: “No, it’s best I do it alone. It’s more of a
older business relationship. I don’t want to make “him think that this is a, how do you say,
untrustworthy trade, if you will.” TRAVIS: Well, being that you’ll be out, anything
you need done for the ship or the crew while you’re away, as your quartermaster? MATT: “Well, oversee the repairs to The Mistake, I
believe they’ve begun before the night is over for “a bit. We probably will not need it for this
endeavor, so it will begin and when we return from “Darktow it should be complete.” TRAVIS: Wonderful. All right. And your crew? Do I
need to keep an eye on anyone? MATT: “Not in particular. They’ll be looking
around here, they’ll be preparing. Gather their “materials, anything you think you require for the
trip at sea go ahead and gather it, go amongst the “Sundry Square, purchase what is required, and then
hopefully within the next 48 hours we’ll be back “out on the waves.” MARISHA: 48 hours. TRAVIS: Wonderful. TALIESIN: What’s Allison been up to? MATT: Drinking in the back, having a conversation
with somebody and keeping one eye over at the table. Seems just perturbed. Not directly intent,
but occasionally narrowing her eyes in the direction of Avantika. TRAVIS: Being that this is our first time in
Darktow, I would like to see the rest of the area. Would anyone care to join me for a stroll? MARISHA: Ooh, night walk? TALIESIN: That sounds like a great idea. LAURA: Sure. MATT: “It is good, if you are going to do a night
walk alone, or together as a group is much better “than alone.” TALIESIN: What should we be looking out for? Is
there some sort of natural dangers, unnatural dangers? TRAVIS: Back corners, alleys? MATT: “Well, the laws say you’re not to steal from
another pirate in here, but only if they’re caught.” MARISHA: Oh, I forgot. LAURA: Oh, you totally could have gotten the stuff
from that guy. SAM: (frustrated noise) MATT: “But there are others out there perhaps who
see fresh faces and think, well, easy prey. Best “not to cause a huge commotion immediately after
arriving. Nobody does that, right?” TRAVIS: No. LAURA: Definitely wouldn’t. TRAVIS: Who would be so foolish? Little would they
know, they’d be tangling with Avantika’s crew, and that’s something they don’t want to mess with,
right? MATT: “One would think, yes. Anyway, I am a bit
tipsy, and I’m going to find myself an evening’s “rest. The rest of the night and tomorrow is yours.
Good eve.” SAM: Bon soir. MARISHA: Good night. LAURA: Bye. MATT: As she gets up, some of the rest of the crew
stands up, you see Bouldergut in the back stand up as soon as the captain stands up, and goes like,
“We going?” “Come on, this way.” Walks by, puts her hand on your shoulder, and into your ear,
Fjord, as she whispers, she goes, “I’m staying “upstairs, second room on the left,” and leaves. LAURA: Did any of us see that? MATT: Make a perception check. LAURA: (laughter) TALIESIN: Oh, that’s a bad roll. TRAVIS: You see everything, why are you even
rolling? TALIESIN: 11. MARISHA: It feels pretty public. LAURA: 15. TRAVIS: You’ve got fucking Mad-Eye Moody’s eye
where it’s on me the whole time and the other one’s doing its own thing. MATT: Actually, Caduceus, just from his passive
perception, has seen this. What did you roll? LAURA: 15. MATT: 15? You see there’s a momentary pause as she
walks by, and the hand on the shoulder that catches your attention. You can see the lips
move and make out the essence of the conversation. The rest of her crew slowly gets up, and some of
them stay to drink, some of them go out to find their way in the night. MARISHA: I need to pee. Anyone know where the
bathroom is? LIAM: Pretty sure it’s anywhere. TALIESIN: Outside. MATT: You do recall, walking through the city, a
number of individuals stopping at the edge of the docks and pissing into the ocean. SAM: In Halfling I will say to Beauregard: Hey,
don’t you think we should go talk to that Allison person? MARISHA: I was already on it, I respond back in
Halfling. SAM: Can I tag along? MARISHA: Mm-hmm. Jester? LAURA: Mm? MARISHA: Do you have a pen and paper I could
borrow? SAM: She asks in Halfling. LAURA: I don’t understand what– MARISHA: Sorry, got caught in a language loop. Do
you have any pencil and paper, or pen and ink? LAURA: Yeah! Well, of course I do, I always have a
lot of stuff on me, here you go. MARISHA: Just like a scrap, thank you. I scribble,
“Meet in the alley” on the piece of paper. Is there an alley? I’m assuming there’s an alley
behind this. MATT: I mean– SAM: There’s no streets, it’s all alleys. MATT: It’s entirely crafted of alleys. No, I mean,
it’s not very jam-packed around this particular tavern/inn, but there are some nearby buildings
where there are alleys. This place is surrounded by streets because it’s right there on the front
near the shipyard. MARISHA: “Meet in the back alley.” To be
specific. SAM: Vague directions. MATT: Okay, and what do you do? MARISHA: Will you go with me to the ladies’ room
so we can powder our noses together? SAM: Sure. I love a good powder. MARISHA: Let’s go powder. As I walk out, I shake
Alice’s hand, say: Nice to meet you. And palm her the piece of paper that’s folded very tightly. MATT: Okay. As you take her hand, she pulls back.
You get a closer look at her, there’s this heavy scar over one eye that keeps the eye mostly
closed. You can see there looks to be a ruined eye beneath there that’s healed over and is not
functional. She wears it proudly as a point of intimidation or at least a badge of whatever gave
her that scar. As she pulls back a little bit, her other hand going towards the dagger on the side
that’s now revealed from behind her coat. You palm her the note and she looks and takes it– MARISHA: Give her a wink and walk off. MATT: She crumples it with a terse look and lets
it fall to the ground. LIAM: Ooh! Cold. MARISHA: I go– and I walk out. She’ll read it,
right? SAM: Where’s the bathroom? TALIESIN: I’m going to get some air. TRAVIS: Ridiculous. SAM: We just walked across the whole place. I
haven’t seen the bathroom once. MARISHA: Let’s go around to the side of the
building. SAM: Oh? We’re just going to take a shit in the
alley? MARISHA: We are a hundred percent going to take a
shit in the alley. LIAM: Here comes the fanart. I hope. MATT: You guys walk out into the cold night air.
The heavy mist has fallen across Darktow and you can barely see beyond the outskirts of the city
where the ocean begins. You can still hear the waters coming in against the rocks on the outside
of the island, but you cannot actually see where the water connects. Beyond that, you can see the
outline of the ship masts that are set at the end of the shipyard that are vanishing into the mist
that surround you. What do you do? MARISHA: I go towards the back “alley”. MATT: Okay. You find what would be considered an
alley behind the Inn and Tavern. MARISHA: I show Nott where to take a shit. I wait
either for the rest of my friends or for Alice to eventually read the damn thing– SAM: Is it Alice or Allison? LAURA: I thought it was Allison. MARISHA: Allison. TRAVIS: She’s on a nickname basis already. SAM: Maybe that’s why she didn’t listen to you.
Because you called her the wrong name. TRAVIS: She’s like, “We’re not there yet! We’re
not fucking Alice yet.” MARISHA: It works half of the time. LAURA: That’s so pretty. MARISHA: It’s super awesome. SAM: If she comes out here, what are we going to
say to her? MARISHA: I just want to figure out what her beef
is with Avantika. Maybe she can be our key– SAM: But she’s going to ask who we are. What do we
tell her? That we’re disgruntled members of her crew? MARISHA: Yeah! SAM: But she can turn us in! That’s terrible. We
should say that we’re– MARISHA: We can get information from her first. We
don’t have to necessarily always give information upfront to get information and we can always lie. SAM: I’m not good at that. MARISHA: I am. SAM: Okay. MARISHA: Yeah. SAM: Yeah, you’re right. You’re very charismatic.
We’re going to be fine. MARISHA: I feel like that’s slightly underhanded. SAM: No! It seems that way because I’m making a
face because I’m halfway through a dump right now. MARISHA: I don’t break eye contact. SAM and MARISHA: We got this. TRAVIS: Oh! The hand touch! No! SAM: I’m ready. MARISHA: All right. TALIESIN: Maybe that is better. LAURA: We’ve reached a new level. TRAVIS: Maybe that is better, yeah. LIAM: (as Nott) All right! I’m done! Hand me that
dead cat! MATT: Here we have the direct connection from
campaign one to campaign two: Sam has taken a shit live with both characters in-narrative.
Congratulations. SAM: You’re welcome, Gary Gygax. MATT: What are the rest of you doing? Caduceus,
you went out for some fresh air. TALIESIN: I went out. I’m standing by the front
door, bouncer-like, and trying to get my bearings, take a look around, see what the vibe of this
place is. TRAVIS: I’m come join him out front. MATT: Jester? LAURA: I’m staring at this milk that I ordered and
it’s really disgusting. And I– LIAM: You’re not going to drink that, are you? LAURA: No, it has lumps in it. LIAM: Yeah. Well, it’s a lumpy place. LAURA: Yeah. LIAM: You doing okay? You seem a little off to
me. LAURA: What? I seem off? LIAM: Yeah, you seem distracted around this
woman. LAURA: Oh. I just, well– MARISHA: (sneezes) MATT and LAURA: Bless you. MARISHA: I’m sorry. LAURA: I don’t like her very much. LIAM: Oh, is it because she’s a murderer? LAURA: No. LIAM: Oh. I don’t like that part about her. LAURA: Oh, but we’re all kind of murderers
sometimes, aren’t we? LIAM: I don’t think that all of us are murderers. LAURA: No? LIAM: Are you a murderer? LAURA: I mean, we have killed some people. LIAM: Yeah, but that’s a very specific thing. You
know, if your life is in danger, that’s one thing. You know, if something happens in the heat of the
moment or there’s danger in both directions. Murder is premeditated. That’s a very different
thing. I find it hard to believe that you have killed someone with premeditation. I could be
wrong but– LAURA: No, I don’t. I haven’t ever done that. I’ve
done some pretty shady stuff though. LIAM: That I believe. LAURA: Have you done some shady stuff? LIAM: Yes, I have. LAURA: Have you done stuff that’s pirate-y before
you were a pirate? LIAM: Yeah. Sort of. LAURA: What’s the shadiest thing you ever did? LIAM: Oh. Well, Nott and I have robbed people for
sure. People with not a lot of money so that we can eat. LAURA: That’s okay, though. LIAM: That did that we did to you when we first
met you. You know, we turn one thing into another and then we go stay at an inn and buy food and
then it turns back into pennies and that’s not so good, but when you’re starving. LAURA: But it is a really cool trick. They got to
see magic. LIAM: They didn’t know it, though. LAURA: That’s true. It all balances out. You’ve
done really good things, too. LIAM: Yeah. LAURA: Do you want some of this lumpy milk? LIAM: No. Do you want any ale? LAURA: No. LIAM: Boy, this is quite a predicament that we’ve
gotten ourselves into. How the hell– we were visiting your mother. Your mother was so lovely– LAURA: I know! She’s so nice! And now we’re
pirates and I’m never going to see her again. LIAM: That’s not true. LAURA: It’s really possible, Caleb. What if we can
never go home? LIAM: We’ll get you home. We’re here– this is
Fjord’s thing. We’re his support. We’re here to help him out. Beauregard and I don’t want to be
here forever either, I don’t think. I know that I do not want to be in this place or on the sea
forever. It’s interesting. LAURA: Nott definitely doesn’t want to be in the
sea. LIAM: Nott is like a cat clinging to the ceiling.
She’s like a cat on a hot tin roof. LAURA: I think Caduceus doesn’t like the water,
either basically because it tried to kill him a few times already. LIAM: Really none of us like it here but Fjord,
kind of. LAURA: I don’t even know if he likes it a lot. LIAM: There’s parts of it that he likes. LAURA: Like Avantika. LIAM: I don’t know. You’re sweet on him, yeah? LAURA: I don’t know. LIAM: Yeah. LAURA: It feels funny. LIAM: How do you mean? LAURA: Well. You know, when you really like
somebody, but then you start to know them, and you go, “Do I like them or do I like what I thought
they were?” and then you don’t know? LIAM: I think so. LAURA: And then you think that they are flirting
with you, but then you found out that probably weren’t, you know? MARISHA: Or just saving your life. LAURA: So you feel kind of sad about it and maybe
a little stupid. LIAM: That’s a little out of my realm of
experience. I’m sorry. LAURA: You had a girlfriend before though, yeah?
(whispering) You said her name when we were dancing and then I put you to sleep and you said
her name again. LIAM: I don’t forget anything. LAURA: Was she pretty? LIAM: She was handsome. LAURA: Was she a boy? LIAM: No. I said she. LAURA: Oh. Okay. LIAM: She was handsome. LAURA: I’m trying to get an image of her in my
brain here. LIAM: Yeah? LAURA: Did she have like a really good nose or
something? LIAM: The best. LAURA: Really? LIAM: For me. LAURA: You’re mysterious, Caleb, you know that? LIAM: That was a long time ago, anyway. Let’s just
focus on getting out of this place away from that woman. LAURA: And now she’s saying we all have to take
the same boat. How are we going to get away from her? LIAM: Is there anyone paying attention to us? MATT: Make a perception check. TALIESIN: Where are you guys talking? LAURA: Just literally right there at the table. TALIESIN: Oh, never mind. LIAM: Or like just leaning in a table together
very low. Elf. 11. MATT: Okay. The crowd is pretty vibrant around
here. A quick glance around you, you don’t see anybody specifically paying attention or
interested. LIAM: Well, I don’t care. I’m pulling out the wire
and I’m putting it in my mouth. We’ll take care of her if we have to. (coughing) LAURA: Are you okay? LIAM: Yeah, just a cough. A cold. I want to get
the hell off this island eventually, but we’re here now. Tomorrow– LAURA: Tomorrow, we find some books! LIAM: Yes! We’ll find– no. Probably not. But
we’ll get sorted. We’ll make the best of this place. We’ll help Fjord figure out his shit, I
suppose. LAURA: Yeah, that’s important to him. LIAM: Yeah. Then we’ll get out of here and then
you can reassess back on dry land. LAURA: Yeah. Thanks, Caleb. LIAM: Thanks for not leaving me on the street like
a drunk. LAURA: (giggles) I thought about it. It would have
been pretty funny for you to wake up, but I like you more than that. Are we sleeping on our boat?
Where should I go? LIAM: I think we’ll probably going to get a room
somewhere here. Is this place an inn or a tavern? I did not even look coming in. MATT: Glancing now, looking through the back,
there is this staircase that winds up to a secondary floor and it looks like there probably
is lodging. LIAM: Did Avantika leave or did she go up? MATT: Avantika left for the moment. TALIESIN: I’ll have to secure the things– LIAM: Probably to shit in an alleyway. TRAVIS: You’re up front, right? TALIESIN: I’m sitting out front. I’m doing the
door. MATT: What are you guys doing? LAURA: I guess just sitting in here for a while. MATT: Caleb? LIAM: Just drinking until– TRAVIS: I put my hand on Caduceus’ shoulder. How
you doing? TALIESIN: I think I’m doing all right. I’m just
contemplating where we’re going from here. TRAVIS: You seemed a little more at ease. I’ll
lean in a little bit. TALIESIN: I am a little more at ease. TRAVIS: You do much drinking in there? I’m not
really getting the fumes on your breath. TALIESIN: I’ve only gotten drunk once in my life. TRAVIS: Really? TALIESIN: And that was because of Nott. TRAVIS: Is there a reason for that? TALIESIN: I thought I’d try. It didn’t agree with
me. TRAVIS: What happens when you drink? TALIESIN: Everything hurts and it’s violently
offensive to the body on every level. That stuff’s disgusting. Just awful. TRAVIS: Did you have stuff in your cup, right? You
don’t have to fake it. You can just– TALIESIN: Well, it feels polite and not everybody
is as understanding as your friends, you know? TRAVIS: Right. TALIESIN: I just sit in the corner and I listen to
everything that I can for as long as I can and it got a little noisy in there and thought I’d get a
little air. TRAVIS: Anything popping up on that special radar
of yours? TALIESIN: Oh yeah. This place is dangerous. She’s
dangerous. TRAVIS: Yeah. That she is. Should we grab the
others and go explore for a bit? TALIESIN: I think that’s a good idea. And Fjord?
You know why everybody’s doing this. Why we’re all here, right? TRAVIS: Yep. I mean, I think. TALIESIN: I think you know it. I just want to
point it because that woman, she doesn’t care what any of us want. I’m sure she’d be interested, but
it’s way low on her priorities and I don’t trust anybody who puts other people’s needs that low on
the list, and you should keep mind of that while you’re getting in bed with them, so to speak. TRAVIS: Is anybody out here in earshot? MATT: Outside at the moment? No. TALIESIN: Nope. TRAVIS: Yeah, listen. About that. Let’s just keep
it right between the amigos, all right? Just because– TALIESIN: What part of the body is the amigos? TRAVIS: No. That’s us, right? One amigo, two
amigo. You and I are amigos. TALIESIN: Okay. TRAVIS: It’ll be our thing. Like we’re bunkees. We
share– TALIESIN: Amigos. We share amigos. TRAVIS: No. We’re not going to share amigos. We
are the amigos. TALIESIN: That’s even better. TRAVIS: Sharing amigos is a whole other– yeah. TALIESIN: I think I get it. I’m not going to talk
out of turn and I trust your intentions, so– TRAVIS: Well, actually, that’s kind of what I
wanted to talk to you about. You’re real good at picking up on little things, yeah? TALIESIN: You’re asking if I can tell you’re
conflicted? TRAVIS: Heh, no, I think that’s pretty clear. TALIESIN: You’d be amazed, but all right. TRAVIS: I’m just letting you know I’m trying to
keep her close. I feel like this whole thing’s getting a little out of sorts and the best way to
keep a small finger on the pulse of things is to– TALIESIN: Sure. I’m so glad you put it that way.
You’re a good man, Fjord, so be careful, because I imagine it’s a little out of character being
honest and truthful with somebody in a deceptive way. It can muddle a good man up whereas it
doesn’t muddle a bad man up. TRAVIS: Yeah. Haven’t been very good at it so
far. TALIESIN: That’s one of the reasons why I like
you. TRAVIS: Thank you. TALIESIN: Here for you, man. I’ve been learning to
swim. TRAVIS: Yeah, more of that to come. Where’s the
rest of these chuckle-fucks? TALIESIN: Oh, two are mysteriously vanished. I
think they were mumbling something about trying to find an alley– MARISHA: Nott, will you stand guard now, because
now I have to take a shit. SAM: Okay. MARISHA: It’s been that long. MATT: For the record, you guys do wait for about
an hour and a half, two hours– no sign of Allison. SAM: Do you think we should go back in? TALIESIN: We don’t take that long, I think 30
minutes is– MATT: Right, I’m just letting them know. That’s
how long they would wait before they know that she that she’s not coming. SAM: All right, I guess we’ll go back inside,
then? MARISHA: Two more minutes. SAM: Sure. Do your business. What– TRAVIS: Head down, huh? Contemplation. SAM: What do you think of our pirate vessel so
far, of our pirate mission? Are you having fun? LIAM: If ever you’re going to squat on that chair
in a perch, this is it. (laughter) MARISHA: Okay, what was your question? SAM: Nothing, we can go back in– MARISHA: All right, let’s go. TALIESIN: Release. MATT: You all make your way, gathering once more
in The Bloated Cup. (laughter) TALIESIN: That’s where you’re supposed to go,
god! MATT: Right back around. Oh, man. TALIESIN: I love you so much. You give so much. (laughter) MATT: All right, so what do you guys do? TALIESIN: I want to take a night walk. MARISHA: Night walk! Night hike. TRAVIS: (singing) I want to take a night walk–
that’s not a song. LAURA: All of us together? SAM: Yeah, let’s go for a walk. TRAVIS: We’ll poke our heads back in and go–
We’ll wave them out. TALIESIN: The crew should also have some place to
sleep. Let’s make sure everybody is taken care of. SAM: They can go back to the boat, right? TALIESIN: They’re having a bad time– what do you
guys want? MATT: Orly seems to be playing the mother hen with
Marius playing assistant to that. TALIESIN: Mr. Orly, we feel terrible about
everything that’s going on. We want to make you guys as comfortable as possible through this
deeply inconvenient situation we’ve all found ourselves in. MATT: “I would be lying if it wasn’t deeply
inconvenient.” TALIESIN: Appreciate your honesty. TRAVIS: (whispering) Ask him about the Diver’s
Grave. TALIESIN: What would not be an insult– LAURA: I hit his hand. High five! TALIESIN: Like that– I know that would be an
insult– but what would not be an– How many kids are here? MATT: “If we’re staying behind, I’d say give me
about a hundred gold to watch over the nest around “here. When you return, we’ll hopefully– I
understand, perhaps, you m-m-might be coming back “for us?” TALIESIN: Without question. MATT: “Then I’ll return whatever was not spent.” TALIESIN: That’s a good idea. MARISHA: I’ve got 50 gold on that. TRAVIS: I’ll get the other 50. TALIESIN: Thank you, kids. We are– unless
something goes tragically wrong– we expect to be returning, and I imagine you’ll hear word if
things go tragically wrong. MATT: Marius comes over and goes, “Right, now,
hoping no tragedy, just come back and get us off “this fucking hell-hole.” LAURA: Well, if we don’t come back, can’t you take
the Mistake and go home? MATT: “If you don’t come back, I don’t know.” TALIESIN: How long do we expect to be gone for? MATT: Travel from here to there and back, about
four or five days round. LAURA: Two weeks, if we’re not back in two
weeks– TALIESIN: If it’s two weeks, the ship is yours. MATT: “All right. Well, I wish you all m-m-much
luck.” TALIESIN: I appreciate that. Hopefully you will
not have to play a funeral dirge for us. MATT: “I am hoping that is never the case. Guess
I’ll just make some coin in the interim.” TALIESIN: That’s fair. TRAVIS: If I may, Orly, you seem to be very
familiar with the Diver’s Grave and the song. Do you know anything more specific of it and
creatures that might be in that area? Things to look out for? MATT: “I mean, standard deep-ocean folk.” TRAVIS: Deep-ocean folk? MATT: “Sharks.” MARISHA: (whispering) Mermaids. MATT: “Other underwater beasts.” TALIESIN: What’s a mermaid? MATT: “Perhaps m-m-mermaids and other such
dangers.” TALIESIN: How many teeth does a mermaid have–?
What is that? LAURA: Mermaids are part pretty people and part
fish people. TALIESIN: Those are both very dangerous. LAURA: Well! Yeah. TRAVIS: Any good things about the area that you
care to share? MATT: “Probably some worthwhile loot there amongst
the sediment.” TRAVIS: Right. TALIESIN: Any idea how long ships have been going
down in that region? MATT: “Oh, a few hundred years, maybe?” LIAM: A few hundred years? Is there some sort of
weather pattern or natural phenomenon that is responsible for this? MATT: “No, ships go down all over the coast.” LIAM: But there aren’t creepy stories about every
inch of it, is there? MATT: “There are quite a number of creepy stories
on every part of this here coast.” LIAM: Fair point. SAM: Do you know how deep it is to the bottom
there? Is it deep, deep ocean, or just medium-ocean? MATT: “Can’t say I do.” SAM: All right. MATT: “M-m-my apologies.” TALIESIN: Thank you for your time, and thank you
for your trust. MATT: “Come back.” TALIESIN: Working on it. TRAVIS: All right, who are we missing? MARISHA: Night hike. We’re all here. TRAVIS: Why are you guys wiping your hands on your
pants? MARISHA: Don’t worry about it. SAM: It’s fine. TRAVIS: Okay. Who wants to go explore? LAURA: Let’s go. SAM: Let’s go explore! LIAM: What are we looking for? Are we just taking
it in? MARISHA: We’re looking for fresh air. TRAVIS: Yeah, I figured we’ll use the night air to
our advantage, acclimate a little bit. TALIESIN: Let’s take a walk. Let’s see what there
is to see. I’m excited about this. LIAM: Learn the city. TALIESIN: Yeah. MATT: Yasha leans in and goes, “If there is any
trouble, should I…?” TRAVIS: Oh, if there is trouble, let’s try and
resolve it– well… MATT: “I trust you, just–” MARISHA: Gauge it as it comes? TRAVIS: Yeah. MATT: “Tell me when you want–” TRAVIS: The Judge? Will do. It’s so intimidating
when she says it like that. MARISHA: It is. LAURA: Can I have taken, I’m assuming, a short
rest and heal up from my fight while we were all chilling here? MATT: Sure. MARISHA: We should get a wig for the Judge like
the Plank King has. TRAVIS: For the sword? MARISHA: Yeah. TRAVIS and LIAM: A wig? MARISHA: Just throwing it out there. SAM: Sort of like a golf club cover? TALIESIN: Like a tea-cozy. A sword-cozy. MATT: Okay. You guys leave the tavern. TRAVIS: Up away from the docks. MATT: Okay. As you exit– Caduceus, you notice
this– but Jester, as everyone’s leaving, you to the back of it, you feel a hand grab your arm for
a minute. You look over to the side, and you may not have noticed earlier, but Vera had been in the
inn, in the tavern vicinity. She pulls you back from the rest of the group for a second and looks
you in the eye with this intense stare. You can see the wrinkles on the sides of her face pushing
into this tight crow’s nest on each side, her irises bloodshot. She goes, “He would not be the
first she’s left in ruin, and he would not be the “last. I will take care of him if he cannot.” She
releases you and spins around and walks off to her room. TALIESIN: I caught a bit of that, right? MATT: You saw them discuss, but you weren’t– At
the point of talking and looking, you wouldn’t have made out the words necessarily. LAURA: (whispering) Whoa. MATT: You guys are here in the open night air.
You’re pushing midnight, here at Darktow. LAURA: It smells like poop out here! TRAVIS: Checking the bottom of my shoes, like:
What did we step in? Why is it–? SAM: The sea breeze. At night, it’s a
land-breeze. TALIESIN: Actually, I have to stop really quickly
and use the bathroom. There’s these little outhouses over in the corner right here that drop
straight down into the– TRAVIS: Outhouse, campaign two. Here we go. TALIESIN: Yeah. It’s like the tower bridge. SAM: Is anyone on the streets? LIAM: Ja, and how well-lit is it out here? MARISHA: Yeah, who’s watching? MATT: It’s pretty misty. There are not heavy
clouds in the sky, and the moon seems to be not a full moon, but it seems to be fairly bright, but
because of the mist, it diffuses. There is this general faint moonlight throughout the entire
vicinity of the town. What that does is it makes distant visibility a little harder, much like fog
lights at a distance. There are a number of patrolling individuals– no uniform to them, but
they walk around, torch in hand, looking through the streets, keeping an eye. They’re armed,
armored, but haphazard and no uniform. MARISHA: This is the Revelry? MATT: Everyone here seems to be a part of the
Revelry– including yourselves now. LAURA: Keep your hands on your coin purses. SAM: Okay, if we’re going to talk about these
things, let’s use some code words. Don’t say her name, say a different name. TRAVIS: Like? LAURA: Tiffany. SAM: Yes, Tiffany. MARISHA: She’s kind of like a Tiffany. TRAVIS: Okay, Tiffany. And? SAM: The name of the ship. TRAVIS: Which ship? SAM: Tiffany’s ship. LAURA: That’s the name: Tiffany’s Ship. SAM: Tiffany’s Ship is the name of Tiffany’s
ship. MARISHA: That makes it clear. TRAVIS: How will they crack this if they hear us? SAM: That’s all the code we need, all right. TRAVIS: How do we reference the–? MARISHA: We call it the– TRAVIS: The Apricot. SAM: The Apricot. MARISHA: The Apricot. SAM: Anything else before we get into this? MARISHA: Wait, is the Apricot this, or is the
Apricot the tiny Tiffany Ship? TRAVIS: Nope, it’s this. MARISHA: It’s this, okay. LAURA: Your heart? The Apricot is your heart? TRAVIS: Say that again? TALIESIN: It’s the tip of the tiny Tiffany Ship. SAM: All right, so, how will we deal with
Tiffany? MARISHA: Holy shit! TALIESIN: Which one’s Tiffany? TRAVIS: Let’s walk-and-talk about Tiffany. SAM: Of course we’re walking-and-talking. MARISHA: I’m keeping an eye open for every
suspicious-looking asshole. LAURA: Tiffany can be invisible though, you guys. SAM: Everyone do this. TRAVIS: Tiffany doesn’t know that we’re talking
about her. SAM: She went to bed, she’s fine. LAURA: I’m going to keep an eye out to see if the
mist ever parts around us. MATT: Okay. Both you and Beau make perception
checks, please, since you’re both keeping eyes out. TRAVIS: Come on! SAM: She won’t know we’re talking about her
because we’re using a new name, Tiffany, so she’s not even going to know. TALIESIN: 26. MATT: Okay. You’re keeping a gauge on any of the
wandering, patrolling guards to make sure as to not to speak too loudly or in the presence of
anyone; conversation either shifting temporarily or coming to a lull and walking by in silence, but
you manage to snake your way through a relatively quiet town beyond the various taverns this late at
night. TRAVIS: A lot of store fronts and things that are
closed up for the night. MATT: You do wander through what you assume to be
the Sundry Square eventually, through this wandering. There is a makeshift pavilion where
it’s dotted with tables and crates under ratty awnings and canopies, but it’s all closed and
dark. There’s no lights. It looks like none of the materials for sale are left behind. It’s mainly
just a structure and materials are probably brought there in the morning and are placed out
for trade, sell, or whatever. LAURA: Don’t you think it’s weird that someone
would be a pirate and they would come here because they were a pirate and then they change their mind
and decide to be a shopkeeper here instead? TRAVIS: No. Maybe they were looking for a new
environment and they found exactly what they were looking for. LIAM: Maybe they thought they were tough and
strong, and they were not as tough and strong as they thought, so now they sell rope. MATT: Make a history check. MARISHA: It feels like a farmer’s market. It feels
like certain people sell things whenever they got them. TRAVIS: Ooh, natural 17, for 19. LIAM: 12. MATT: You do know Darktow, before it was taken by
pirates about 45 years or so beforehand, it was just another city of the Clovis Concord. It
belonged to the Menagerie Coast, and it was one of the central port stops for a lot of the trade
routes making their way to the coast. Then it was taken by the Revelry, and they reinforced it and
made it defensible. They didn’t slaughter everyone there, because they weren’t there to kill
everyone. They were there to take it over. They killed those who were, in their opinion,
incorrectly placed in charge, any dissenters, and then anybody who agreed to join the Revelry, “Join
or Die” type circumstance, everyone who had previously been at the island were absorbed into
the Revelry. Some of them have continued their life there, some of them, their bloodline has
continued to be those that maintain other forms of business. Not everyone is technically a pirate;
there are a lot of members of the Revelry that are just civilians of Darktow and maintain the
island. TRAVIS: There was a lot of assimilation here. TALIESIN: Like Orlando. MATT: (laughs) Sure! (laughter) TALIESIN: Not everyone’s a retired person or a
college student. Somebody’s got to actually clean that place up. (laughter) SAM: We love you, Orlando. MATT: Yes. TALIESIN: I really do. I have plans. (laughter) MATT: Hear that? Taliesin has plans for you,
Orlando. TALIESIN: Deep plans. SAM: If I may? MARISHA: Okay. SAM: Here’s our options. TRAVIS: Here it is. MARISHA: Do you have a powerpoint? SAM: I don’t, but I’ve been thinking about
things. TRAVIS: How drunk are you? SAM: I’m lit. I’m tight, but feeling good. TALIESIN: Amigo. SAM: Our intent is to get off this island without
Tiffany, correct? MARISHA: Mm-hmm. Well, I think it’s less about
getting off this island without Tiffany and more about getting to that shipwreck first, before
her. TRAVIS: I think that’s the highest priority. The
only thing that we haven’t discerned from Tiffany is if she knows where the next– SAM: Apricot? TRAVIS: No, we know where the apricot might be,
where the next apricot tree might be. SAM: Fruit stand? Apricot tree. TRAVIS: Or fruit stand. I like it. SAM: Here’s our options. I’m just putting them out
there. I put no weight on any of them. We can follow Tiffany tomorrow as she goes about her day.
We can get in touch with this Allison person, follow her– MARISHA: Bitch. SAM: I know, right? (laughter) TRAVIS: Well, if you used her right name. SAM: We could talk to some of Tiffany’s crew,
right? Bouldergut seems dumb. LAURA: You shouldn’t use her real name. TRAVIS: Yeah, wow. SAM: Sorry. Franklin Delano Roosevelt seems dumb. (laughter) SAM: Also the former quartermaster, Theodore
Roosevelt. (laughter) SAM: Then, there’s this Sorris fellow. I don’t
know, he didn’t seem like he’s be a font of any knowledge. LAURA: I like him. SAM: We can sabotage Tiffany’s ship. I don’t know
what that would do because we need it to get off the island. We could frame Tiffany for some crime
against another pirate! We have a signature from Tiffany in a letter that she wrote. We have– that
is all that we have. MARISHA: Well, she’s not currently at her ship.
I’m assuming a lot of her valuable information is locked away in her captain’s quarters somewhere on
Tiffany’s ship. If we can get the information to the next apricot tree, then do we need Tiffany
anymore? LAURA: I just remembered. SAM: What? LAURA: Well, I have this new spell that the
Traveler was telling me about. It lets you pop in somewhere. You can just pop in and then you can
bring somebody with you. It’s like a doorway. SAM: You could pop in where? To her ship? To her
captain’s quarters? LAURA: I would pop into her office. SAM: On the ship? On the Tiffany ship? MARISHA: How far? LIAM: How far away can you do a pop-in? LAURA: That’s a really good question! Let me think
about it. Hey, Traveler, how far away can I use this spell? 500 whole feet, he says! SAM: That’s a lot. MARISHA: That’s a lot of feet. So many feet. Look,
if I’ve learned anything about important people, it’s that they can’t resist putting shit down on
paper. I guarantee you, there’s something in her office. LAURA: I don’t know how we would get out of it
once I was in there though, because I can only use it once but I suppose– SAM: You can just leave. LAURA: Yeah, but wouldn’t somebody be keeping
watch on the ship, though? SAM: But it’s our ship, we work on the ship. MARISHA: Do we have credentials? Do we have like,
badges? Like beep-beep? MATT: No. TRAVIS: Well, I can tell you that her quarters
have a balcony. MARISHA: Oh, can you? LIAM: We could also potentially send Frumpkin with
a note or letter. LAURA: And do what? LIAM: Leave it. SAM: You mean like plant something? MARISHA: No, I want to get something. SAM: Rifle through her stuff. TRAVIS: Yeah, because if we are planning to leave
without her, that means she’ll give chase– I mean, I hate to even suggest it, but I’d rather
not have someone hot on our tail. LIAM: Also, this leads me to a question I have
which is, instead of discussing the short term which we want to do, I want to ask you about the
long term. If we ditch Tiffany, and we find the apricot tree, what happens then? Like, what is
your plan with this apricot? I think we have ideas about what could come from it. She’s done what she
did at the first tree and you got the next tree, and maybe she races to the– What happens next,
Fjord? Like, I know you are curious, but what is the plan? LAURA: Should we be using your name or should we
call you something else right now too? MARISHA: Tusktooth? LIAM: We’ll call him Honda. MARISHA: So many nicknames. TALIESIN: I’m lost. TRAVIS: Well, as Honda, I would race to the
apricot and seize it so that she can’t pick that fruit. Keep it for ourselves in our fruit basket,
and make off and decide if we’re going to make marmalade later or not. TALIESIN: I like marmalade. LIAM: Do you know how, at the first tree, an
apricot was picked and things shook, something happened there. This place was all about drei,
the number three, so you want to go pluck another fruit and that’s two out of three and what happens
once the third– TRAVIS: We actually don’t know where the other
tree is yet, that’s the thing. We just know where the fruit is. MARISHA: Personally, I feel more comfortable with
Honda controlling the supply of apricots than Tiffany. TRAVIS: They’re in season right now. LIAM: I am not telling any of you, especially you,
what to do here, but an alternative plan is to get rid of anyone who knows about the location of the
tree and bury the tree. MARISHA: The tree we just came from or the tree
that we’re going to? TRAVIS: If we do that, we might need to ask
Tiffany if she knows the location of the tree because it hasn’t been brought up as of yet. MARISHA: Fuck asking Tiffany any questions. We
break into Breakfast at Tiffany’s and get the information that we need. TALIESIN: That was a long walk. TRAVIS: It was a long walk, but we’re all on the
same page. Okay, are we up for a little B&E? MARISHA: Eyy, this is my specialty. TRAVIS: In real life or the game? MARISHA: No comment. I plead the fifth. LAURA: Will we be using the fancy doorway? MARISHA: I think to get in, yeah. TRAVIS: Yeah, absolutely. Don’t you have another
way to make a door? TALIESIN: That’s in an emergency. LAURA: Well yes, but that is– SAM: That would be permanent. LAURA: That’s the thing, she would definitely see
there was a new door. MARISHA: Also, you said there was a balcony
right? TRAVIS: Yeah. MARISHA: Was there a door to the balcony? Do you
think that would be locked? TRAVIS: I mean there was a door– was it solid
wood or did it have glass? MATT: No, it had two glass doorways, like windows,
but they open like doors and latch shut. SAM: Wait, if you could get in to her cabin, you
can Disguise Self as well, right? You could change yourself to Vera or something? MARISHA: Or to Avantika. SAM: Or to Avantika or Vera? MARISHA: I mean Tiffany? SAM: Oh shit! Shit! MARISHA: Fuck! We were doing so well. MATT: Roll initiative! MARISHA: Who’s here?! SAM: You could turn yourself into Franklin Delano
Roosevelt. You could walk off the ship and no one would think the wiser, or they might say,
“Franklin Delano Roosevelt! Why are you on “Tiffany’s ship?” You’d be like, “Bitch, I work
here.” TALIESIN: Why are there two of you here? SAM: I’m Franklin Delano Roosevelt! TALIESIN: Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt and then
you’re two people on a ship and you’re involved in things and– I mean, it’s a good emergency plan,
but can you only go once? You can’t go twice? LAURA: I can’t go twice. I can just do it once. LIAM: What if some of us kept Avantika busy? LAURA: Tiffany. LIAM: This is difficult. TALIESIN: A few of us were eating apricots at the
time. LIAM: What if Fjord keeps Tiff busy- SAM: Honda. LIAM: Man, oh man– LAURA: Honda keeps Tiffany busy. LIAM: What if the green guy and the gal are busy,
you follow? MARISHA: Do we need to have Honda distract
Tiffany? Can we not do this right now while she’s theoretically sleeping? LIAM: Let me finish the thought. You do that
thing, you take your little doorway over, you do what you want to do, then poof, you are Tiffany.
You walk off the boat, because Tiffany is busy. MARISHA: That’s true, he could be accountable. LIAM: 100% busy, not maybe busy, maybe she’s
sleeping, maybe she’s out for a walk. MARISHA: For sure busy. We could have this guy
with Frumpkin making sure that they’re busy, if you’re comfortable with that. You don’t have a lot
of a choice. SAM: Can you keep Tiffany busy for, you know, 15
or 20 minutes? TRAVIS: Sure. SAM: 25 if you really had to? Take a break? TRAVIS: Maybe with a short rest. Maybe. LIAM: It’s real quiet at this table. (laughter) SAM: This is a good plan, and we’re going to go in
there– oh, you’re going to go in there. Do you need some help? LAURA: I should bring somebody with me. MARISHA: This is my forte, man. LAURA: Okay, me and you, Beau. MARISHA: Okay. SAM: Except Beau can’t make herself look like
anything else. MARISHA: But if I’m with the queen, then what does
it matter? TRAVIS: Who’s the queen in this scenario? SAM and MARISHA: Tiffany. SAM: Fake Tiffany. LAURA: You don’t want yourself connected with this
at all. MARISHA: I could take the– that’s a good point.
Fuck. LAURA: Plus, here’s the thing. Caduceus is really
perceptive. TRAVIS: The two clerics are not going on the
mission together! SAM: I can break into things. LAURA: That’s true. TALIESIN: You’re very sneaky. LIAM: You’re small. SAM: I can also talk to Caleb. LIAM: That’s also true. MARISHA: How are you going to get off the boat? SAM: I can make myself look like something. LAURA: That’s true, you could be Sorris. TRAVIS: Doesn’t Ipsis– small like? MATT: Ipess? Ipess is a gnome, yeah. SAM: I could be Ipess. LAURA: Ipess! That’s right! TALIESIN: I can give you guys enhanced ability,
too, for the remains of the evening. You can pick something and both of you, if you want to be
better at something for a little while. LAURA: We never get into trouble together. I mean,
this is foolproof. SAM: It cannot fail! LAURA: Any time we’ve tried to do anything
together, it went off seamlessly. SAM: This is the best plan we’ve ever had. TRAVIS: That’s a natural one, this is going to
fucking suck. (laughter) TRAVIS: All right. Okay. MARISHA: What are me and Cad doing? SAM: We need someone just off the boat in case
things go awry. I’ll message you that we need some help on the inside, and there needs to be someone
on the outside of Honda and Tiffany in case he needs some help in there, I don’t know. TRAVIS: No. MARISHA: Cad, can you go with Honda? TALIESIN: I wouldn’t know how to help with that. MARISHA: You have to be nearby. TALIESIN: It also seems like a lot of commitment,
but okay. I can keep an eye on that. TRAVIS: Also where are we staying tonight? Are we
staying at The Bloated Cup, or we finding– LAURA: We could stay on the boat. That would solve
all of our problems. MARISHA: Can we? TRAVIS: On Tiffany’s ship? LAURA: I mean, we’ve been staying on it already,
don’t we have quarters on there? MATT: I mean there are quarters on there you can
stay in, yes. SAM: Where were we meant to stay? Where are the
other crew staying? On the ship or on land? MATT: You’re not sure. Some of them you saw found
rooms up top, above the tavern you were in. Others left for the night, you don’t know where they
went. TRAVIS: It might not be a bad idea to find a room
that’s not at the Bloated Cup and not on the ship. Just so we’re not suspicious. TALIESIN: Have we seen anything around like
another tavern or something maybe a little, I hate to say, more upscale, but cleaner? MATT: Not really, not here. TALIESIN: Something with less piles of shit behind
it? MATT: No, you get the sense that Darktow doesn’t
have a lot of offerings for travelers, since most of the travelers that come through here are part
of the Revelry. Only a few of them stay offshore. You passed a number of homes of people that live
here or spend a lot of time here and have in a boat. TRAVIS: How do you feel about rooms at the
Bloated, Cad? TALIESIN: Yes. TRAVIS: Three rooms? TALIESIN: Three rooms. TRAVIS: Hopefully some with windows? SAM: Sure. TRAVIS: Smells like shit in there. LAURA: We all wait until Fjord starts boning, and
then we start our action. MARISHA: How about this: Caleb and Caduceus and
Fjord, you’re one team. You have Frumpkin watch Fjord, you give me the word when it’s good to go,
I’ll deliver that to Nott and Jessie, they go– LAURA: This is way more complicated than I thought
it was going to be. TALIESIN: I don’t know, actually I’m following it
actually for the first time this entire– MARISHA: I’ll give you the signal, you guys go,
I’ll be nearby, I’ll distract any guards if need be with my feminine wiles, and then you let me
know if there’s any emergency– SAM: You’re the runner. MARISHA: Then I will have no means to communicate
with anybody else, but you will. SAM: Sure. TALIESIN: You’ll be a good go between. If we hear
something bad, we can get an owl to ship, if you hear something, then– MARISHA: Actually, that’s a good point. How far
away is the Bloated Cup from the boat? MATT: From the boat? The Bloated Cup is right off
from where all the docks join and from the shipyard, so it’s maybe about 300 feet away. MARISHA: Oh, that’s amazing. Cool. Perfect. TRAVIS: Famous last words. MARISHA: Good. It might be our downfall, but it’s
great. MATT: All right. MARISHA: Okay, so I’ll try and be within eyeshot
of the Bloated Cup, within eyeshot of you. SAM: Honda, are you going to be able to– TRAVIS: Look, I’ll be fine. I’ll make sure she’s
occupied. SAM: I’m just saying, there’s gonna be a peeping
tom in the room with you. TRAVIS: Now, what do you mean “in the room”? SAM: I think we need Frumpkin in there. TALIESIN: No. TRAVIS: What form is Frumpkin, an octopus? SAM: A peeping tomcat. TRAVIS: Is he there? LIAM: He’s right here. MARISHA: Oh, he’s been in my— MATT: You see this really uncomfortably frazzled
owl that’s been jammed in a pocket. MARISHA: Sorry I don’t– TRAVIS: Am I carrying him in, like it’s no big? TALIESIN: No, I don’t think we– SAM: No, he can fly outside the window and peek
in, just to see if you’re– LAURA: Avantika knows, I mean Tiffany knows that
that owl is yours, Caleb, it’s not like it’s a secret, if she’s seen the owl before she’s going
to know you’re spying on her. TALIESIN: We don’t need to actually know what’s
going on in there. Why does anybody need to know that? TRAVIS: Yeah, I don’t think so. Listen, let’s just
kick this thing off. I’ll toss Frumpkin back to Caleb. Look, I leave this in your capable hands. LIAM: Well, Frumpkin has had a peek inside of her
quarters after she has seen him. She did not see him the first time. Although, to be doubly sure I
could change his shape again. TALIESIN: Well, I think the thing to do here, I
mean, it just makes sense, is that if you leave the room for any reason, we send Frumpkin to the
ship. They see Frumpkin, they know it’s time to– MARISHA: To get out. TALIESIN: That’s the signal. TRAVIS: If for some reason Tiffany’s on the move,
or if something seems up, listen for thunder. How about that? MARISHA: Here, I slip Caduceus a few of those
firecrackers that I have. LAURA: His boning makes thunder. SAM: What’s the source of the thunder? Is that
like– LAURA: His weenie. TRAVIS: Nothing I could say would beat that. So. LIAM: But, you know, if we’re not comfortable, I
could change Frumpkin to be, say, a raven or something. TRAVIS: Sure, whatever you feel is best. MARISHA: How long will that take? TRAVIS: All right, here we go. I head off towards
The Bloated Cup. LAURA: We head towards the ship. MARISHA: Break! LAURA: We walk towards the ship. MATT: As you begin to settle towards your
directions for the evening here, under the shadow of moonlit mist, within the pirate city of
Darktow, we’re going to go ahead and take a break. We’ll be back here in a little bit to see how
this– MARISHA: This is either the best plan or the worst
plan. MATT: I’m excited to see what the fuck is going to
happen next. Before we leave, we do have our Wyrmwood giveaway. Our fantastic friends at
Wyrmwood have brought this fantastic– Oh, this is pretty wood! This is a lacewood tabletop dice
tray. It looks like bronze dragonhide the way it looks against the– it’s so pretty! Leather inside
there, it’s awesome. One lucky winner will have this at the end of the break. Jump over into the
Critical Role Twitch chat, that’s twitch.tv/criticalrole. To enter, the codeword
tonight is “pirates.” Plural, pirates. Enter the word once to enter. Any more than that and
unfortunately you’ll be disqualified. Only people in the US and Canada, excluding Quebec, can enter,
because of stupid international gifting contest rules. Anyway, we’ll be back here in a moment with
the winner. See you then. MATT: And welcome back, everyone. Before we get to
it, we do have our winner of the fantastic lacewood tabletop dice tray from our friends at
Wyrmwood. It is EmperorGeiserick. EmperorGeiserick, congratulations. We’ll get your
info and get this sent out to you ASAP. Well done, hope you enjoy. Bringing us into the moment as you
guys scatter to your various plans. MARISHA: It’s a great plan. MATT: We have Fjord going to the upper floor of
the Bloated Cup. What are the rest of you doing at this moment? TRAVIS: Real confident, real strong. TALIESIN: I’m staying downstairs to wait for you
to either come down or for her to leave. I’m going to sit and probably try and find something
non-alcoholic to drink so I don’t have to be an idiot. LIAM: That’s where it’s going to go down is in the
Bloated Cup. TALIESIN: Upstairs. LIAM: I thought maybe it would say like maybe you
know, romantic on the boat. But great. Good. So, if that’s the case, then I’m not getting into that
room. I think that I should tail this team instead, if you’ve got an eye on the exit to that
building. TALIESIN: Let me see, yeah. LAURA: Shouldn’t you be able to Message Nott and
say she’s on the move if– LIAM: Yeah. LAURA: So maybe stay close where you can see it if
she leaves? LIAM: Yeah. MATT: Okay. Yasha is doing what as part of this? TALIESIN: I think Yasha is probably either with
you– She’s either with you or with us, I imagine. MATT: Probably with you. She’s a bit conspicuous.
If things go really bad, she’ll be ready to help out on that side of things. TRAVIS: If Bouldergut is in the Bloated Cup,
that’s where Yasha is. MATT: There you go. MARISHA: I turn my cloak inside-out to the
inconspicuous side, and case towards the docks, and start casing the area for Revelry that are
guarding the area, or potentially, a good place for them to do the thing. MATT: Make a perception check. TRAVIS: Is somebody aiding you in that? No. MARISHA: 13. MATT: 13. Okay. Looking out along the docks, there
are two particular watch-outs that are assigned to that particular part of the docks, where the
Squalleater is currently wet anchored. You also see two individuals on the deck of the ship, not
holding torches, but you can see them through the fog. One of them walks and moves. That’s what you
see. MARISHA: Do I see anything that looks like it
could be a potentially good area for them to cast a spell without being noticed? MATT: The docks are pretty open here. There isn’t
much of a place to hide. This isn’t a major shipping region. Most everything is taken off the
docks and off the ships and then brought into shore, so there isn’t a bunch of errant piles of
boxes and barrels, per se. The docks are pretty open. Best bet would be somehow under the docks,
but most of that is in the ocean, or trying your best to wait for a moment when people aren’t
paying attention. MARISHA: Okay. I block around as to not look like
it’s going the same way that I just came from and catch back up with these two. With the
detectives. MATT: All right. As you guys are having this
conversation, Beauregard manages to circle back and come back to you. MARISHA: All right, there’s two guards casing the
dock and two of Avantika’s– Tiffany’s people on the ship. It looks pretty open, we might want to
find an alternative for you guys to not be noticed as you do the crazy magic thing. SAM: It looks open? MARISHA: It’s super open, two guards guarding the
dock and two people on the deck of Tiffany’s ship. SAM: Getting on is not a problem. LAURA: Yeah, we can just go to our quarters or
something. MARISHA: To then bamf over? Our quarters in the– SAM: Inside the ship. LAURA: Yeah. What do you think? MARISHA: Okay. SAM: We can just be there. MARISHA: You guys are going to have to talk to
guards and convince yourself on the way in and you will be noticed. SAM: No. We just are in. LAURA: Because it’s our ship. SAM: What do you mean? MARISHA: We’re talking about two different things
here. SAM: Please, start over again. MARISHA: There are two guards guarding the docks,
there are two people on the ship of Avantika’s bo– of Tiffany’s boat. On the de– You get what
I’m saying? The deck of the ship. Of the boat. SAM: Uh-huh. TRAVIS: It’s real sotto, so we don’t have to use
code words anymore. MARISHA: If you all want to just walk on to your
quarters, you will have two guards and two of our crew members who will see you walk on. LIAM: I think what Beau’s implying is perhaps it’s
better that we’re never seen there at all. MARISHA: We hide somewhere and we’re never seen at
all and you’ll bamf in. Unless you disguise yourself as Tiffany now. Then I would say we find
a hidden place, potentially in our private quarters in the Bloated Cup, that you bamf into. LAURA: Is it within 500 feet of– MARISHA: He said it was within 300. LAURA: Fuck yeah. Yeah, let’s go to our quarters
in the Bloated Cup. SAM: We’re going to start the bamf there. LAURA: Start it in the tavern! MARISHA: I will be nearby, near the docks. Signal
if you need me. SAM: You won’t see us ever. MARISHA: Good. LIAM: Here is how I would like to contribute.
First, I’m going to disguise myself when it is time. Not yet, but I will make myself look like
voice actor Charlie Adler. I will be salt-and-pepper– I’ll fit right in on the docks. MATT: Oh, you’ll fit right in in Darktow. LIAM: I won’t be in a denim tuxedo, but I will
wear traditional pirate garb. TRAVIS: He’s our type, man, he thinks sleeves are
bullshit too. LIAM: They are bullshit. There will be no sleeves
on this disguise. I’m going to hang out between the Bloated Cup and the ship, looking like
Charlie. Frumpkin I will just have circle a continuous circle above the whole area so I can
see the guards on the boat, and we can message each other, ja? I’ll just be eyes in the sky,
Charlie on the ground. MATT: You got it. All right. TALIESIN: How’s a dex bonus go for you? How’s an
advantage on dex, or do you already have– SAM: I mean, I have very high dexterity. LAURA: Could always use advantage. SAM: Okay. TALIESIN: Less that could possibly go wrong, so
before they go in, I’m going to cast Enhance Ability on these two. At a level three, so I get
two people. SAM: Maybe charisma? MARISHA: Yeah, for the deception. SAM: Leaving. TALIESIN: That’s fair. All right. SAM: I can already dex my way around. LAURA: We could potentially jump out the window
too. SAM: But you can’t. LAURA: What are you talking about? SAM: Are you dextrous? LAURA: I’m so dextrous. TALIESIN: It also will give you zero damage for a
20-foot fall, if I give you a dex bonus. But– SAM: I have Feather Fall. TALIESIN: You have Feather Fall. So you want
charisma. SAM: Maybe? TALIESIN: That’s not helpful. Charisma. Unless you
make a decision in the next 30 seconds. SAM: Yes, I want it! Give it to me now! TALIESIN: Cool. And you’re getting wisdom. You
have advantage on wisdom, you have advantage on charisma. Then right before you go in, I’m going
to give you guys both a resistance bump before we push them through the door. Just in case you need
it. LAURA: We’re up in our rooms. TALIESIN: For one minute, they can add a d4 to a
saving throw. SAM: Ooh, did anyone touch the dodecahedron yet? MARISHA: Someone do that. SAM: Fjord, do you want to do it? I guess you’re
already fucking. TRAVIS: No, I’m not. SAM: Do you want the dodeca? TALIESIN: Is it just a general d4 bonus? MATT: What are you using? TALIESIN: A cantrip. You touch one willing
creature once before the spell ends. The target can roll a d4 and add the number to its roll. MATT: It’s Resistance. It is a concentration, so
that would override your Enhance Ability. TALIESIN: Oh, you’re right, absolutely, never mind
then. Not a big deal. Thank you. I’m getting used to this concentration. MATT: That’s all good, no worries. It’s a little
bit of a juggle. All right, while this is all being set up– LAURA: Nott, just look at the dodecahedron. SAM: (screaming) MATT: You have your– SAM: Fate point. MARISHA: Before they leave and we all go our
respective ways, I go: All right, listen. Rich people love to have safes, but they love to hide
stuff in the walls of safes, like false bottoms in drawers. Stuff like that. TRAVIS: False backs to safes. MARISHA: False backs to safes. So even if you get
in, and you think you find everything, double- and triple-check, all right? They love to write shit
down, I’m telling you it’s there. LAURA: Okay. SAM: You’ve stolen from a lot of rich people. LAURA: Yeah. She stole mail one time. SAM: I know, it’s sort of her defining trait. LAURA: That and her beautiful hair. (laughs) MARISHA: Thanks. SAM: When you laugh right after you said that, I
think that was very insulting. (laughter) MARISHA: Was she not complimenting me? SAM: No, she was laughing. LAURA: I wasn’t, Beau, I love your hair. I wasn’t
laughing at you! MARISHA: Just go steal from rich people. LAURA: I wasn’t laughing at you, I love your hair,
okay. SAM: We’re ready. Let’s do this. MATT: While you guys begin to set your ways,
Fjord. You make your way to the Bloated Cup. Where do you head? LIAM: (singing) Thunderstruck! TRAVIS: I’ll head up the stairs to the second room
on the right, was it? LAURA: (whispering) Left. Second room on the
left. MATT: Do you want to knock? TRAVIS: Anyone in the hallways? MATT: At the moment, no. TRAVIS: No sign of Bouldergut? MATT: Make a perception check. TRAVIS: 11. MATT: No, no sign of Bouldergut. TRAVIS: She’s an ogre. MATT: I know. TRAVIS: Okay. Yeah, second door on the right, and
I’ll put my ear against the door. MATT: Make another perception check. TRAVIS: Shit, balls, ass. Oh, three. MATT: You don’t hear anything through the door. TRAVIS: (sighs) MARISHA: Can’t hear from the blood pumping in his
ears? TRAVIS: (heartbeat) (knocking) MATT: There’s a slight pause and you hear some
rustling and some shuffling. A voice goes, “Who is it?” TRAVIS: Oh, sorry. Is– (clears throat) is the
captain in? MATT: “Who the fuck is this?” TRAVIS: Fjord. Who’s this? MATT: “Piss off, I’m sleeping.” TRAVIS: Second door on the– Is there a door
across the hall? MATT: There is. TRAVIS: I’ll put my ear on that one. MATT: Make a perception check. TRAVIS: Three. MATT: Don’t hear anything. (faster heartbeat) TRAVIS: Does it look like there’s any light on
under the door? MATT: Maybe a faint bit. (knocking) MATT: You hear some heavy shifting. “Hi?” TRAVIS: Bouldergut? MATT: “Just open the fucking door.” “Okay.” The
door comes open. You see there, crunched down in the room, head hunched forward, is Bouldergut,
who’s been holding vigil at the doorway. (grunts) Pats you into the chamber. You get pushed in.
Avantika’s sitting on the edge of the bed, currently reading through a book with the window
open outside, and goes, “Quartermaster.” TRAVIS: Captain. MATT: “Bouldergut, if you would be so kind as to
keep watch on the hallway for a bit.” Bouldergut goes, “Okay. If I hear any–” “If you hear
anything, don’t bother.” “Okay.” She leaves the chamber, closes the door behind her. Closes the
book, sets it on a small table. TRAVIS: She’s very loyal. MATT: “That is my favorite kind of person.” TRAVIS: How long has Bouldergut been with you in
your service? MATT: “Going on the better part of a decade. We
actually both met when I was first beginning my career.” TRAVIS: Quite some time. How have your evenings
been? MATT: “Well, very busy with our attempt to make it
to Darktow and keep things organized in “preparation. So. Lonely.” TRAVIS: Any more dreams? MATT: “A few.” TRAVIS: Tell me. MATT: “How about I show you instead?” TRAVIS: Yes. I’d like that. MATT: So you begin keeping her busy. LAURA: Oh. I see. MATT: Or she keeps you busy, actually, would be
more the– TRAVIS: Yes, that’s more correct, yeah. MATT: While that’s happening, you guys made your
way back to the inn. It’s a very muddied view of the ship because of the mist, but you can still
make out the major details of the outskirts of it from this far away. LAURA: Okay. I don’t need to be able to see it. I
know exactly the spot I desire. I can visualize it because we’ve been in her office before. MATT: Correct. You have. So yeah, you can. SAM: How does this work? LAURA: I don’t know. I’ve never done it before. SAM: Well, is there a chance it could fail? Might
we die? LAURA: Never. LIAM: Do me a favor. I’m going to go outside now,
okay, and keep watch. Let me know when you’re on and give me updates. Good luck. Charlie Adler. MATT: All right. The best new abracadabra. LIAM: Charlie! For every spell. MARISHA: I’m on my way towards the docks. SAM: Are we synchronizing watches? What is this? LAURA: Doorways are the tits! SAM: What? Ah! MATT: There’s a brief moment where you feel like
the air’s been drawn out of your lungs, and you feel as if you’re being suddenly thrust forward
from behind, somebody pushing the small of your back with such intense speed that you feel like
your neck is about to just whiplash terribly backward. Then suddenly you come to a stop, and
you’re both standing in the middle of Avantika’s quarters on the ship. It’s dark. LAURA: I cast Pass Without a Trace on both of us. MATT: All right. MARISHA: Yas, queen, yas. SAM: That was amazing! We are secret agents! We’re
secret detectives! LAURA: We are amazing! We need to start looking
because we only have a few minutes. SAM: Yes. Oh, wait, I’ve already forgotten! Take
out the wire, fold it just so. Okay. We’re in the ship, Caleb. MATT: What’s the range on that? SAM: 120 feet. Can you hear me? Reply to this
message. MATT: The range on Message? SAM: 120 feet. MATT: 120 feet? He’s out of range. LIAM: I’m out in the docks. You said the boat– MATT: Correct. You haven’t made it there yet. LIAM: Oh, okay. MARISHA: You’re staying in between. I’m heading a
little bit further. The daisy chain. MATT: Yeah, because you guys instantaneously
traveled. He has a few more minutes before he’ll reach range. MARISHA: So you guys, to Beau, to Caleb, to Cad,
to Fjord. SAM: Beauregard, can you hear me? If you can,
respond to this message. MARISHA: I can hear you. I have responded to this
message. SAM: We are inside the boat. Relay that message
when you can. Bye. LAURA: Okay, start looking. Can we both see,
because we both have darkvision? MATT: You can, but there’s a lack of color. It’s
mostly some shades of black and white and gray. LAURA: We should probably figure out a way to
light up the room. Are there curtains? MATT: There are two sets of small curtains that
are currently tied off on the sides of the windows that can open onto the balcony. SAM: Do you want to burn them for light? LAURA: No, we should close them. SAM: Oh, okay. That’s better. LAURA: I sneak over and close the windows
quietly. SAM: Just close the windows. MATT: As a general note, I would like you both to
make a stealth check as you go about your activities. SAM: Hood up. LIAM: Also, while they do that– I’m sorry. MATT: Just a moment. LAURA: Oh, you already have advantage? Blessing of
the Trickster! There you go, I gave you blessing, so you get advantage. TRAVIS: Can you give yourself advantage? LAURA: (gasps) Natural 20! SAM: 18. LAURA: Plus ten, because Pass Without a Trace. MATT: 28, and what’s your total? LAURA: 24? No, wait. 34. MATT: Okay. MARISHA: Fuck. Yes. MATT: You both are (whooshing). For every piece of
wood that begins to creak as you step, because it is a lot of aged wood that makes up this ship,
begins to (creak), you stop yourself, and then shift the foot and you manage to make your way
across here without any of the wood creaking. LAURA: Does she have a candle in the room that we
could light? MATT: There are a number of candles, you could see
that there’s– SAM: There’s probably gap under the doorway, a gap
under there. They’ll see a glowing light. LAURA: Take your cloak off and shove it under the
door to block the light. SAM: I would reveal my unmentionables! LAURA: I take my cloak off and I put it next to
the doorway to block the light. SAM: I’ll take my cloak and hang it over the
curtains so it’s double-blocked. MATT: Okay, like duvet over the window. LAURA: I light the candle. MARISHA: I signal to Caleb that they’ve made it on
the ship. LIAM: I was going to say, once I’m out and about,
about once every 30 seconds I will lean on something, pretending like I’m slightly drunk, and
I will go into Frumpkin’s vision from above, just for five seconds, to look at the activity on the
boat and where those guards are, and then go out of it. MATT: Perception check for Frumpkin. I’ll say at
disadvantage because of the mist, unfortunately. LIAM: Okay. Ooh, terrible. So terrible. That’s six
or seven. MATT: Okay. You can see the torchlight from the
two guards that are on the actual docks, and one of them’s keeping an eye out on the water, and one
of them’s keeping an eye on the docks. They’re stationed to keep an eye out not just to what’s
happening within the actual shipyard, but also beyond, as far as they can into the mist, for any
ships that are arriving in the middle of the night. But Frumpkin cannot see the people on the
actual deck of the ship. LIAM: It’s all that fog. MATT: Yeah. All right. TALIESIN: Does Nott’s cloak unattune if they take
it off? MATT: Technically, yes. Now that you have the
candlelight there, gently there, quietly. LAURA: We start searching through her office. MATT: What are you looking for? LAURA: We’re looking for anything she’s written
about where the last fruit tree is, the last temple. SAM: You’re going through papers, yeah? LAURA: I’m going through papers. SAM: I’m going to go around the walls and look for
hidden safes. LAURA: I’m looking through her desk, seeing if I
can find any false bottoms or anything like that to try to find secret information. MATT: Okay. Do you want to each make an
investigation check, or do you want to help one or the other make it? LAURA: Each make an investigation. MATT: Then both of you make an investigation
check, please. LAURA: Oh, we get advantage? No. MATT: No, you do not. SAM: We get advantage on everything. MATT: You took charisma and wisdom, so you do
not. LAURA: Shit. SAM: 19. LAURA: Nine. Which is like a natural 20 in this
campaign. MATT: Going through the desk, the first thing that
happens is one of the drawers gives you resistance. It’s locked. The other drawers you
pull open, there is blank paper, a quill, a couple of small little ink pots. The next one beneath has
a folded piece of cloth that you pull out and inspect. It looks like it’s a cover either for the
desk or something else. You’re not quite sure what the purpose is. Checking under the desk, you don’t
find any other hidden chambers or anything that marks what you were searching for. LAURA: Okay. MATT: Nott, you were looking for–? SAM: Hidden safes in the wall, trap-opening
thingies. MATT: Glancing around, there is a shelf unit with
a number of books on it. You pull back some of the books and look behind it, along the back of the
actual bookshelf itself. You don’t find any hidden pockets in there. There’s a small cabinet
underneath, and you open it up and there’s a series of wooden and metal cups, wine goblets and
various types of imbibement containers. Pushing through there, you do find one panel on the back
that’s a bit loose, and you slide it off and behind there you see a small leather book. SAM: I’ll check it for traps. MATT: Make a– SAM: Investigation? MATT: The weird perception/investigation thing for
traps, this is the eternal debate back and forth. Go ahead and consider this a perception check. SAM: Three. MARISHA: What? What would investigation have
been? SAM: 12. MARISHA: But you’re a badass rogue! MATT: It depends. There’s a difference between
noticing something’s off, and then ascertaining the nature of whatever’s off that would be an
actual trap. Since you’re looking for traps, specifically for this one, and not noticing
something different, I would say allowing this to be an investigation. SAM: Well, it’s still pretty low. 12. MATT: I know, yeah. LAURA: This is better than three. MATT: I know. It does not appear to be trapped. SAM: Okay. I will pick up the book. MATT: Okay. You pull the book back, and as soon as
you pull back there’s a slight tug on it, like something that gives resistance, and then comes
free. A little piece of cable or twine falls to dangle from behind one side. SAM: We’ve been made! Turn over the place. MATT: (hissing) LAURA: Oh no. Hit the deck! MATT: This room begins to fill with a very faint
fume. SAM: Hold your breath. LAURA: We hold our breath! I take out the paint
and I paint a hole in the bottom of the floor. In! SAM: Not yet, no! Hold your breath, we’ve got to
look around! I’m still looking, I’m holding my breath and I’m looking. You paint, I’m looking. I
look at the book, is there anything there? MATT: Looking inside the book, there’s a bunch of
scrawlings. What languages do you know? SAM: Common, Goblin, Halfling. MATT: You do not recognize any of the languages in
the book. SAM: Taking the book. MATT: You put the book inside your pocket. SAM: I’m going to go over to the desk where Jester
had pointed and start jimmying the lock on the locked thing. MATT: Okay. Make a lockpicking check. SAM: 15. MATT: 15? It’s not opening. SAM: Pull it open. (grunt) And just: smoke! LAURA: I try to pull it open. MATT: Okay. Make a strength check. MARISHA: Come on! LAURA: 18. MATT: Okay. You pull the drawer: it breaks open.
Loudly. SAM: Sure. MATT: You pull the drawer open, look inside. It
looks like there are a few small jewelry boxes that are resting inside. SAM: Taking them all. MATT: You take them all. LAURA: I was just looking, but you can take,
okay. MATT: Okay. The drawer, do you put it back? LAURA: Sure. MATT: Okay, you shove it back in. The edges are
splintered. It is very apparently physically damaged. You also hear footsteps descending from
the outside of the door. SAM: We’ve got to look more! LAURA: (negative noises) SAM: Okay, get in the– LAURA: Is there a rug in the room? MATT: There is a rug, yes. LAURA: Then I pull the rug over the hole that I
just made after we go under. SAM: I’m going to grab a cloak off the thing. LAURA: Oh shit, I do the same thing, I see her do
it and I grab my thing and blow out the candle, and go. MATT: Okay. First off– TRAVIS: I don’t need this in my life. SAM: Now there’s a permanent hole there. MATT: What’s your constitution modifiers? SAM: Modifiers? Two. LAURA: Two. MATT: Okay. With the little bit of conversation
that’s there, that’s reduced the time, you’re just now hitting the time where your breath is starting
to hurt, so you both, holding it, dive down and then, what, you–? LAURA: As I go down the hole, I pull the rug over
the hole. MATT: Okay. LAURA: I have no idea where this takes us. MATT: As you’re doing this, you hear a voice
going, “Hello?” and you hear the rattling of keys. You guys, by the way, you’re down now on the lower
deck, this is the deck where most of the crewmen quarters are, and you’re down in one of the
bedrooms. You glance over to the side and there’s a person sleeping in the bed right there, the
blanket coiled over. They’re like, (snoring). SAM: I’m going to very quietly say: Wait until you
hear a body fall above us. LAURA: (whispering) Take one of the things you
stole and put it next to them. SAM: (whispering) Okay. (normal volume) What did I
steal? TRAVIS: Jewelry boxes. MATT: A bunch of jewelry boxes. SAM: Can I open one up and see what’s in it? MATT: Yeah. You look inside and there’s a bunch of
jewelry, jewels; it’s an actual small jewel collection. SAM: Put the jewel right on his shoulder. MATT: On the person who’s sleeping? SAM: Yeah, I tuck it under the blanket, like it
was with him. LIAM: Just like Macbeth. MATT: Just the one jewel? SAM: Yeah, I’m going to keep the rest for myself. MATT: Okay, all right. You hear the door above
open. (creak, footsteps). “Hey. Anyone?” The person who’s sleeping is like (snorts, grunts). SAM: We’re going to crawl under his bed. MATT: Okay, both of you guys make a stealth
check. TALIESIN: You still have– LAURA: Oh no! That’s okay. SAM: 23 plus ten, still? LAURA: 18. Shit. SAM: 33, I guess. Right? MATT: Okay. You both quietly duck down.
(footsteps, crash). Your carpet falls down, the guy comes plummeting through, hits the floor,
(grunts). The other guy suddenly goes, “What?!”, pulls out a dagger towards the other guy, who
immediately is like (yells), goes and starts stabbing into the carpet. (yelling) MATT: Going, “What?!” Other one’s like “Oh god!”
Pushes him off, and stands up, and is like, “Jesus!” You see there’s a couple of stab wounds
in his chest. “Zoen, what the hell, man?” Waldok, who you saw getting the tattoo earlier from your
turtle friend. He’s like, “Oh! Shit, Waldok, I “didn’t know! What the fuck, don’t sneak up on me!”
He wipes the blood off on the blanket. He’s like, “Oh, jeez. What the fuck happened there?” He looks
up at this perfectly-carved hole in the floor. Doesn’t notice the gem. He’s like, “Fuck.” ” I’m
so sorry, mate! I didn’t mean–” “Shit, what the “fuck happened?” “I don’t know. It’s a fucking
faulty floor or something!” “Fuck.” “Well, let’s “get you to a surgeon or something.” He stands up
and rolls off and the blanket falls over next to you guys. (clanking) The gem does fall. Neither of
them notice it. You watch as they shuffle out of the room, and the door closes behind them, and you
guys are now in the chamber with the open hole of Avantika’s– SAM: We can go back up, we can keep looking! Lift
me up! LAURA: What if the poison is still up there? SAM: I think it’s probably wafted out by now. MATT: You do also hear the coughing of the man who
was stabbed. SAM: Down the hall? MATT: Yeah. SAM: Peek my head up. MATT: As he’s inhaled whatever had been released
in the room. LAURA: I will lift Nott up, to peek her head
through. MATT: Okay, you peek up and look. The door that
looks inside of the chamber– Okay, first off make a constitution saving throw. SAM: That’s a natural one. Maybe I should reroll
that one, I’ll do my fate die. Okay, that’s slightly better: nine. (laughter) TALIESIN: We’re bad at everything. LAURA: No! MATT: All right, so you are considered confused. TRAVIS: Confused is complicated. MATT: Yep. TRAVIS: He’s going to tell you; you’ve got to roll
to see what happens. MATT: I’ll tell you here in a second what’s going
on now. You get the sense at this moment that the other gentleman, while coughing, managed to resist
the effect of the fume in the chamber. You did not. You do notice the doorway is still open,
because he just came inside to look, and across the way you see them both coming up the stairs,
because they’re making their way up from the crew quarters, to the area near Avantika’s chamber,
which is right by the deck. SAM: Tap her head: Down! LAURA: What? Okay, I bring– MATT: First, while that’s happening, I’m going to
go ahead and roll a d10. TALIESIN: Oh no. MATT: You can act normally. So you can do that. MARISHA: Oh my god, you’re lucky! SAM: Wow! MATT: So you do. SAM: I’m going to say: Down! LAURA: I crouch down so Nott can– MATT: Okay. You both head down in the chamber.
They walk up past. Make a saving throw again. A wisdom saving throw. SAM: Wisdom now. MATT: Yes. Constitution to see that the toxin took
hold, and now it’s wisdom to resist the effect. SAM: 11. MATT: That’s another failure. You’re both sitting
there quietly as they are walking across in front. TALIESIN: Oh no. MATT: You watch as Nott– suddenly her eyes go
wide and she begins to drool a bit, and the body locks up. You’re unable to speak, unable to move. LAURA: (whispering) What? What’s going on? Nott!
Shit! MATT: You hear now a little bit of raised voices
and you can now hear this on the dock. One of them’s going, “What’s going on?” The other one’s
like, “I have to get this guy to a doctor, he got “stabbed.” The other voice goes, “By fucking you,
you twat!” He’s like, “I’m sorry!” “Oh, fine.” They start leading him off the ship. One of the
guards begins to lead them off the docks. LAURA: Can I cast Lesser Restoration on Nott?
Nott. Snap out of it. Nott! MATT: Does Lesser Restoration– LAURA: I don’t know. I didn’t even look. MATT: I don’t know if it does anything for this
spell. LAURA: Condition– no. SAM: It’s a condition. LAURA: One condition affecting and the condition
can be blinded, deafened, paralyzed, or poisoned. MATT: No. That does not affect it, so I need you
to make another wisdom saving throw, Nott. LIAM: Caleb probably has wandered close enough to
the boat now, and hearing– MARISHA: No, I’m daisy chaining to it, I give you
a signal. LAURA: Okay, that’s good. SAM: 19. MATT: You do manage to resist the confusion
effect. Aw, I was so hoping you were going to attack her. TRAVIS: Yeah, she could be straight up like,
“Nope!” LAURA: Oh my god! MATT: Would’ve been fun. LAURA: What do we do? SAM: I don’t know. I don’t know what just
happened. This is a crazy ship. LAURA: I heard them yelling. How do we get off of
here? SAM: I don’t know. LAURA: What should we do? We left a hole in the
floor. SAM: Let’s call for help. Caleb, can you hear me?
We’re in big trouble. MARISHA: No, me! We already went through this. SAM: We need help! We need a distraction. Is Caleb
there yet? LIAM: We’ve established the– MARISHA: The daisy chain. MATT: Caleb does not answer. SAM: Great. Going to try it again. Beauregard,
we’re going to need a distraction to get out of here! LAURA: Nott, tell her nothing crazy, you know. You
don’t want it to connect to us or anything. SAM: Mild confusion and panic, but don’t– what? LAURA: I don’t know. Maybe we can just get out. SAM: We’re going to disguise ourselves? LAURA: Oh, right. Okay. SAM: Hold on, I’ll call you back. LAURA: What are we going to disguise ourselves
as? SAM: You were going to be Avantika and I was going
to be Ipess. LAURA: Are we still going to do that? SAM: It doesn’t make any sense right now, does
it? LAURA: No, it doesn’t make any more sense, though. MARISHA: I wander like a drunkard past Caleb and I
go: Oh, so distracting. Like I need distractions. LAURA: What if I make another hole in the floor
and we keep going down until we can get out. SAM: I guess she will have seen one hole by now. LIAM: Apologies to my German teacher from high
school. I start pissing on the docks and singing: Laurentia, liebe Laurentia mein. SAM: Are there any portal windows? MATT: In the room you’re in right now? No. LAURA: Can I– LIAM: (singing) Am Sonntag. (speaking)
Urination. (singing) Ach wenn es doch endlich schon– SAM: I’m going to grab that jewel that was on the
floor. MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make a performance
check. LIAM: Okay. Well, I’m definitely pissing and
singing. MATT: Yes, you are. LIAM: Yep. I have rolled such shit tonight. MATT: So sorry buddy. LIAM: That’s a five. (singing) Von Dienstag. MATT: For all that you’ve been drinking over the
past 24 hours, the tension has caused your bladder to retain everything and you’re barely eking out a
sputtering stream. LIAM: Oh, okay. Well, I’ll do my best to knock
things over as I go. MATT: There isn’t anything to knock over, these
are open docks. LIAM: (shouting) Hey, Macarena! MATT: All right, you guys. LAURA: Can I stand up on the bed and try to make
the hole look like it wasn’t perfectly painted, like it was like broken wood? SAM: Wait, wait! Just paint wood there! LAURA: Can I do that, though? MATT: Can’t paint on nothing. SAM: Fuck. LAURA: I wonder if I can use one of my pieces of
paper to like put on there and then make it wood, like, fix it. MATT: Okay, you do that and as soon as you do that
the paper falls as a plank of wood. LAURA: That’s what I thought was going to happen,
but I wanted to see. SAM: No, no, no. MATT: It takes you awhile to do that. It’s a few
minutes to paint the wood properly to have the effect kick in. SAM: Sure. MATT: You can mark off another two square feet. In
the time they’re doing that, what are you guys doing? MARISHA: While he is being a creepo, I go over to
the two guards on the dock. This drunk piece of shit over here, he tried to attack me. MATT: One of them has already pushed past you with
a wounded man. The three of them making their way while he escorts them off of the docks, so there’s
only one man left on the dock by the ship. He passes by you as well. They don’t seem interested
in this. LIAM: (singing) We will, we will, rock you. Rock
you. MARISHA: So, guy who was left, that guy is an
asshole, and what’s with that guy that just got stabbed? I feel very unsafe. MATT: “You feel unsafe in Darktow?” MARISHA: No, I’m just saying– MATT: “Welcome to Darktow.” MARISHA: He tried to, I think, rob me? I thought,
as a pirate, that I had immunity to that? I don’t know, I’m just trying– MATT: He shifts in close and he looks at you real
closely and goes, “Actually, I don’t think I’ve “seen you around here before.” MARISHA: Actually, technically, I’m new. Great to
meet you. LIAM: (singing) B-A-N-A-N-A-S! MATT: “We’re going to go ahead and have a
conversation off the docks. Please follow me.” MARISHA: Sure! Let’s go! MATT: He pats you on the shoulder and starts
leading you off the dock. MARISHA: You’re fucking welcome. Go, go, go, go,
go! SAM: How’s her painting going? MATT: Still going. It’s taking her a few minutes.
You’re still doing your distraction. Travis, you’re doing good. LAURA: Good show. TRAVIS: I’ll open the door. Is there any ice? No?
Okay. MATT: A few moments pass. When you finish
painting, the wood falls. While that’s happening, that moment is occurring, you and Yasha, in the
tavern, are keeping an eye. You watch as one of the crewmates comes walking in rather rapidly and
goes and talks to somebody in the corner that you recognize from Avantika’s crew. TALIESIN: I think I’m going to join in really
quickly. Is everything all right? You guys need anything? I’ve been sober all evening so I’m happy
to help. MATT: “I heard Waldok got stabbed for some
reason.” TALIESIN: Who got stabbed? MATT: “Waldok!” TALIESIN: Waldok got stabbed? But Waldok’s so
nice! MATT: “I know!” TALIESIN: Who would stab Waldock? That’s
terrible! MATT: “Exactly! I’m curious!” TALIESIN: Where did you hear this from? Where did
this come down from? MATT: “I saw him! He got stabbed! Right out
there!” and he points out the door and you can see him motioning towards the bar. TALIESIN: Oh, he seems okay, I guess. MATT: You seem him bleeding out. TALIESIN: Come here, we’re going to patch you
right up. C’mon. I’ll take care of this. TRAVIS: Yeah! TALIESIN: Everybody come on, let’s do this. Yeah,
how bad is it? MATT: I mean, he’s not dead, but for his level of
life experience, he’s taken a significant amount of damage and if left it will probably eventually
get infected. TALIESIN: Okay, I’m going to give him a level two
Cure Wounds to get him going. That’d ought to heal him, right? MATT: Go for it and roll. TALIESIN: All right, let’s do a level two. Let’s
see what that looks like. That’s 2d8. Don’t know why I’m being so fuddy-duddy about this. Do I get
a specialty– no, it’s only when I’m healing myself. Okay, 18. MATT: That’s enough to bring him back. You
concentrate on him, he winces and you watch as the wounds close up. There’s no mark, no scarring. He
looks at the wound and goes, “Mr. Clay, thank you “very much.” TALIESIN: Okay, you’re going to want to sit down.
Take it easy for a while. I wouldn’t get up for like a good half hour. Be very gentle on yourself.
Why don’t we get this man a drink? MATT: “I appreciate that. You’re too kind,
really.” Zoen goes “See? No hard feelings, right?” and Waldock decks him across the chin. Zoen falls
to the ground grabbing the side of his face. TALIESIN: Why don’t you get that man a drink? MATT: “I think I’m going to do that.” He gets up.
While that’s happening, and that’s happening, and that’s happening. LIAM: (singing) Hast du etwas Zeit fur mich? MATT: What are you guys doing? LAURA: Okay, I’m going to do what I originally
planned which is to make the hole not look like a perfect hole. To make it look like the planks
broke or something? MATT: Okay. LAURA: Oh wait, no, should I do that? SAM: They’re going to find a hole. LAURA: Leave the fucking hole the way it is! We’ll
leave a couple gems in the bed. SAM: Two gems. LAURA: Two gems in the bed. SAM: One gem. I’ll break it in two. MATT: Make a strength check. SAM: 19. MATT: It takes you a few minutes. LAURA: Oh, come on! MATT: You have to take your dagger and score it a
bit and then try and press it again. Better part of three or four minutes to try to find the right
edge to bend and break it. LAURA: No! MATT: It does eventually break unevenly into three
or four small, crumbled pieces. SAM: Leave that. TALIESIN: Someone was eating gems in bed. TRAVIS: It’s even harder to spot them now. LAURA: Perfect. Now we disguise ourselves, yes? SAM: We’re going to cast Disguise Self on each
other. MATT: Only on oneself, but yes. LAURA: We’ll wrap our arms around each other and
then disguise ourselves. MATT: There you go. Taking the form of Avantika
and Ipess, right? LAURA: No. SAM: I’m going to be Keg. MATT: Okay. LAURA: Oh, okay. I’m going to be Molly. SAM: Great. MATT: All right. TALIESIN: That’s loud. Okay. All right. LAURA: In pirate clothes. TALIESIN: Sure! SAM: Pirate Keg, Pirate Molly. LAURA: Yeah. TRAVIS: The most inconspicuous person. LAURA: With a cloak over his head! TALIESIN: Just a purple tiefling. MATT: You guys are disguised– LAURA: I did it. I already said it. Still Pass
Without A Trace. Still trying to sneak out. TRAVIS: Oh my god. SAM: Up on deck though, and see if anyone’s
around. MATT: Make a stealth check– sorry, a perception
check. TALIESIN: You have advantage. SAM: Perception or– what are we? TRAVIS: Perception. SAM: 19. LAURA: 24. 22, lies. MATT: The mist makes it hard to make out much
detail. You do notice, glancing up, there is an individual in the crow’s nest. SAM: (loading bow) LAURA: No. SAM: No? SAM and LAURA: Shit. SAM: How far up? MATT: I’d say about 40 to 45 feet as an
estimation. SAM: I’m going to cast Phantasmal Force on that
person, on that being. MATT: Okay. TALIESIN: I’ve never seen your eyes glaze over
like that Matt. TRAVIS: What does that do? MATT: All right. What’s your DC? SAM: Intelligence, 14. MATT: DC 14. No, did not succeed with a natural
eight, plus two, ten. SAM: Describe the crow’s nest to me? MATT: In the main mast of the ship that goes up,
the crow’s nest is in itself a circular platform at the top that is used primarily for keeping a watch
on nearby land and details in the sea around, as well as direction. It’s a vantage point for
someone to keep an eye on the area around the ship. There is somebody stationed up there to keep
an eye on the ship overnight. Or at least there for as long as their portion of it was. You can’t
make out the details of the figure from this distance. You just see a figure there. SAM: All right, I will make the figure think that
his crow’s nest has caught fire, and there are little flames licking around, creeping up the
sides of it, and surrounding it. MATT: Okay. As you finish the spell, a moment goes
by and you hear (panicked shouting) “Fuck! Shit!” You look up and you see this individual trying to
bat their cloak on the sides of this before shouting “Help!” LAURA: Run! We run. MATT: While stealthing? Or just running? SAM: Off the back of the boat. MATT: Okay. They have major disadvantage to try
and spot you because they’re distracted by the flames. LAURA: Are we being stealthy? SAM: Yeah, we’re stealthing. LAURA: Were stealthing. TRAVIS: Or running? SAM: No, we’re stealthing. LAURA: Quickly. SAM: We’re moving from– LIAM: You’re stealthing. SAM and LAURA: We’re stealthing! MATT: Make stealth checks. SAM: Okay. LAURA: Still Pass Without a Trace. SAM: 36. LAURA: 21. MATT: Okay. You guys both manage to scoot over to
the edge of the ship. SAM: The seaward side. MATT: The seaward side. All right, You’re heading
off– LAURA: The seaward side? MATT: It’d be the starboard side. SAM: Yes. The side away from the docks. MATT: Correct. You head over to that which is the
starboard side of the ship. There’s the ocean below you. A person screaming up top and getting
more and more frantic. SAM: Jump in! LAURA: Put that book in the bag so it doesn’t get
wet. MARISHA: Why did I get arrested? LAURA: I don’t know. LIAM: None of us knew about the crow’s nest
person. LAURA: We jump in. MATT: Yeah, unfortunately perception wasn’t high
enough. LIAM: (drunken singing) SAM: We’re jumping in. MATT: You both leap off the side into the freezing
cold ocean water. LAURA: Let’s try to go in quietly. MATT: Still going to make a splash. SAM: Baby seal style. MATT: Thankfully, it’s mostly drowned out by the
sound of the screaming from the top of the crow’s nest. As you both break the surface and glance
around the vicinity, you can see some of the torches that are shifting from the other parts of
the dock to come over and see this commotion that’s happening. The screams get more and more
intense before they end with a (yell) (impact). As this person felt there was no other recourse with
the flames gathering around them. Then you hear (screaming). SAM: Swim away. I’ll hold your hand as I walk away
on the water. TRAVIS: I’m in a great deal of pain! MATT: Yeah, whoever it was, they landed. They’re
alive, but they’re not doing that well. They broke something on the way down. TALIESIN: How’s that charisma bonus working out
for you? SAM: I’m lying great. LAURA: This is going perfectly. MARISHA: You shot me! MATT: Now the screaming is less frantic and more a
pained scream while the rest of the various watchers of the dock start making their way over,
while you guys are swimming? TALIESIN: I’m wet and upset! Why did you do
that?! SAM: Just away and around. MATT: Okay, so you’re probably following under the
docks. All right. Both of you guys make an athletics check. TALIESIN: He’s walking. She’s swimming. MATT: That’s right, you’re walking. LAURA: Oh my god, that was almost a one. But it’s
not. It’s a 19. MATT: Actually, you didn’t have to make it because
you’re walking. LAURA: 19. MATT: 19! All right. The water, as it’s coming in,
the waves are crashing against the rocky edge and shore of Darktow Isle right here. LAURA: Don’t let go, Nott! SAM: I won’t ever let go! MATT: One end of the docks, you can hear the
footsteps passing overhead. SAM: Oh god! I’m letting go! MATT: They pass by. You guys make it over to the
edge of the rocks and, with the water pushing, you manage to not be dashed against the rocks to any
point of personal injury. You manage to climb up. I need you both to make a stealth check to try to
make your way back onto land without being sighted by any of the nearby guard. LAURA: Natural 20! SAM: 38. (relieved groaning) MATT: All right. You both are– oh, you’re soaking
wet. LAURA: But Disguise Self, to where we look dry. SAM: I’m probably a bit wet too. MATT: Actually, yeah, because you dove into the
water before jumping in. SAM: Yeah, I’m wet. MATT: Otherwise you’d have taken the impact damage
from that. TRAVIS: (impact) TALIESIN: Unless you’d have taken that dex bonus,
and then nothing would have happened at all! MATT: That’s true. TALIESIN: But you didn’t. SAM: Nope. MATT: It’s all good. You both climb up on there,
dripping a bit wet, you especially soaking. A lot of the guards and the torches are making their way
there, other ones are still starting to make sure they aren’t losing track of their post. What are
you guys doing? SAM: I mean, just calmly walking away, right? Are
there lots more people coming? MATT: They’re coming toward the screaming and
yelling. There are still others there that are patrolling and keeping an eye. They don’t all of a
sudden go: Someone’s yelling! Everyone lose their post! LAURA: Do you think I seem noticeable? SAM: No, you look great. TALIESIN: You’re both wet. LAURA: Yeah, but we’re Disguise Self, so we look
dry. MATT: That’s true. SAM: You look great. Do I look okay? Light my
cigarette. LAURA: Yeah, I feel like you may be less
noticeable than a purple me. SAM: You’ve got a cloak on. LAURA: Okay. LIAM: It’s pandemonium on the docks, right? At
this point? MATT: It’s borderline, but it’s starting to calm a
bit. Some of them have gotten up there, and they found the hurt guy. The spell lasts for how long? SAM: Disguise Self? Or– MATT: No, the– SAM: Oh. The Phantasmal Force? MATT: Correct. For one minute, so it’s faded by
now. As you guys are walking by, you hear the guards going like, “What’s wrong?” He’s like,
“Ugh! I’m hurt!” He looks up and goes, “But it was “on– It was burning! What the fuck?!” He’s
confused and in pain and lamenting why he jumped and what’s going on. The guards are trying to calm
him a bit, and they’re now starting to think something’s up. You can see, now somebody is
giving out directions to the other guards. Something is definitely not right, and the docks
are now going into heightened search mode. SAM: Let’s get the fuck out of here, right? LAURA: Yeah. SAM: We’re just going to calmly walk into town? I
don’t know. MATT: Okay. While you guys are doing that, Caleb,
you see all this happening. LIAM: Yeah, I would have quieted down with the
singing and just tried to go more lowkey. I don’t know what’s going on, so I’m still watching the
boat. MATT: Yeah. Make a perception check. LIAM: And one eye on the Loaded Underwear– What’s
it called? The Bloated– TRAVIS: Bloated Cup? LIAM: Bloated Cup. Fjord’s Bloated Cup. What did
you say? Perception? MATT: Yes. LIAM: Still rolling shit tonight. 12. MATT: 12, okay. You’re just watching this whole
thing unfold. LIAM: Boat. Bloated Cup. Back and forth. Waiting. MATT: You’re lead back to the top of the docks.
The figure has their hand on your shoulder and calls over somebody else. He goes, “Hey, Waynon!
Looks like we got someone who’s stowed away here “to Darktow.” MARISHA: I say: Sup, Waynen? MATT: He looks over to you and goes, “What’s your
business?” MARISHA: I’m with Avantika’s crew. You can ask her
if you want, but I don’t think you really want to. Pretty sure she’s above your pay grade, am I
right? MATT: Make an intimidation check. MARISHA: Great fucking intimidation. Nine. MATT: Nine? He doesn’t appear to be shaken by it,
but at least he finds a bit of truth to what you’re saying. He’s like, “Let her go.” MARISHA: That’s right. MATT: “Don’t go wandering these docks at night by
yourself for no fucking reason.” MARISHA: Oh, I’m sorry. Are you afraid I’m going
to stub a toe in the middle of the night? MATT: He just turns around and walks away. LIAM: Quit while you’re ahead, motherfucker. MARISHA: Beau never does. MATT: You guys start heading back, tracking this
trail of seawater behind you on the docks. Eventually, Beau, you turn around and you see
Molly and Keg walking your way. MARISHA: I just go: Oh fuck. I just keep walking
like I don’t know who they are and I pass by them with a glance. SAM: Good evening, madam. MARISHA: Fuck you. (laughter) TRAVIS: No smoke coming out of the cigarette. SAM: Dripping wet. MATT: All right. You all eventually reconvene. You
eventually complete your time with the captain. TRAVIS: (door slamming) (heavy breathing) I look
down the stairs. Can I see Caduceus down there? MATT: If you passed by Bouldergut and you looked
down, yeah. Caduceus is down there. He’s actually in a healthy conversation with one of the members
of the group. TALIESIN: Talking to the guy. We’re bonding, man.
These guys are pretty okay once you get to know them. TRAVIS: Yeah, I’ll come down and– A drink? MATT: A round is brought to you. TALIESIN: Weird night. TRAVIS: Hey, Deucey. How we doing? TALIESIN: Well, everything’s not quiet on this
end. One of our kids apparently got stabbed by– Well, one of the crew stabbed the other crew. I
can’t imagine why that happened. There’s been no word, but I assume it’s just probably pandemonium
all over. TRAVIS: Oh, good report. TALIESIN: Everyone’s pretty happy, though. You
should come down and have a drink with everybody. TRAVIS: Yeah, I’ll just hold my cup and wait for
something to happen. LAURA: Is anybody in the shit alley? MATT: No. LAURA: We should probably drop our forms. SAM: And dry off. LAURA: Yeah. In the shit alley. MATT: Okay. In the shit alley, as it has now been
deemed, you drop your various disguises. SAM: Are we still soaking wet? MATT: I mean, you’re damp. SAM: Like a dog, I’ll shake it off a little bit.
Do you have any spells that can make us dry? TALIESIN: I hope someone has followed this right
back to the inn, so that’s good. LAURA: (gasps) Oh my god! SAM: Oh no, your weasel’s dead again, isn’t it? LAURA: No. Nott, I have Mending. SAM: What’s that? What does that do? LAURA: It’s a cantrip and I can mend things that
have holes in them. LIAM: Not a giant hole. LAURA: Not a hole that big. It wouldn’t have
worked on a hole that big. SAM: Are you saying to me that we made a mistake? LAURA: Everything we did was perfect. SAM: I agree! LAURA: I mean, it went according to plan. SAM: We got a book! LAURA: Shh, hide that. That’s in my bag, anyway. SAM: We got some jewels. LAURA: Oh! We need to hide those too. SAM: These are hot ice! We got to get rid of
these. LAURA: What the fuck are we going to do? If she
searches our shit, she’s going to know that we stole. SAM: I know. Don’t worry. We’re going to plant
them on Allison. Everything’s going to be fine, don’t worry. LAURA: We got to figure this out, like stat. SAM: Figured. Done. Mage Hand. Allison’s pocket.
We’re clean. LAURA: All right. SAM: Hey, you did good in there. LAURA: You did too, you’re pretty cool! SAM: Yeah, we’re pretty great. LAURA: Okay. We’re going to go into our rooms. LIAM: Charlie Adler busts into the inn and sees
Caduceus and just stops the door and pulls out a little wire and says: I don’t know where anybody
is. We have to go to the boat now! Come on! SAM: Who are you talking to? LIAM: Caduceus. MARISHA: Not to the boat! Never to the boat! LIAM: No one told Caleb shit. MARISHA: You saw a lot of shit go down at the
boat! LIAM: No, I saw people running to the boat in
danger and you lead off. Pandemonium on the ship and fire on the ship! TALIESIN: I’ll tell you what. Obviously whatever
went down– we’re going to just go make sure everything’s copacetic back at the boat. We’ll be
back in just a couple minutes. Just going to make sure everything– MATT: “Okay. Good luck.” TALIESIN: Yeah. We’ll let you know. I’ll walk
brazenly down to the ship with you. MATT: Okay. As you step out of the inn, you watch
Nott and Jester walking towards it. LIAM: They dropped their shit? MATT: They did. LIAM: (protestant noise) LAURA: Hi! TALIESIN: We’ll go check it out anyway. SAM: Don’t worry. LAURA: You’re going down there? Don’t go down
there, Caduceus. TALIESIN: I’m going down. LAURA: No, there’s guards everywhere! MATT: Beau, you probably approached right before
they did. MARISHA: Sup, guys. How was your night walk? LIAM: It went very well, I take it. MATT: Fjord, you’re sitting over and you watch
them all talking just outside of the inn. SAM: There was a little hiccup. LAURA: Schmidle of a one. SAM: But we took care of it. MARISHA: Shh. Who’s around? MATT: I mean, there are guards walking– TALIESIN: Do I see a commotion from here? MATT: The commotion seems to have died down at the
moment. TALIESIN: Nothing crazy going on on our ship? I
don’t see some figures or anything? MATT: Make a perception check from this distance.
I’d say with disadvantage from this distance. TALIESIN: Really? MATT: Yeah. TALIESIN: I would never. Well, that’s fine because
even with a– (counting) 22 with disadvantage. (laughter) TALIESIN: I love this. This is the best character
ever. MATT: Glancing over, you don’t see any
torch-bearing guards, but you do see a figure that is doing a visual pass on the deck of the ship. TALIESIN: I might see if there’s a torch-bearer
walking around really quickly. MATT: You see one that’s maybe 25, 30 feet from
you that’s just walking through the street. TALIESIN: Excuse me, sir. MATT: Turns around. “Hey.” TALIESIN: We had a little trouble on our ship
earlier. I was curious if everything was all right. I heard a little commotion. MATT: “I don’t know. It’s not my jurisdiction
tonight.” TALIESIN: Well, if I wanted to find out what went
down do you know who I would talk to? MATT: “Probably one of the guys closer to the
ship.” TALIESIN: I’ll be right back. MATT: “Okay.” TALIESIN: I’m going to go find a guard and ask
them what’s up. MATT: Okay. SAM: Hey, just throwing it out there, there seemed
to be a couple of loose ends that we need to tie up. Can you make us an alibi? LAURA: What do you mean? SAM: Like, suggest to someone that we were
drinking with them all night, in case it’s asked? LAURA: They’ll know. SAM: Oh, well then don’t do that. Never mind. MARISHA: Who’s really drunk, though? Is there
someone real drunk? SAM: I assume a lot of people down there. MARISHA: Is anyone real drunk? Look real drunk in
the tavern? MATT: Make a perception check. Or actually, this
would be an insight check. MARISHA: That was part of our crew. Part of the
Squalleater. MATT: Make an insight check. MARISHA: Jesus. That’s a natural one. MATT: You only see one figure you recognize from
the crew. MARISHA: Oh, sorry. It’s a four. Ten? MATT: Okay. You only see one figure that you
recognize from the crew and they are recovering from a series of stab wounds and are deep in their
cups. MARISHA: Oh. What’s-his-name. MATT: Waldok. MARISHA: I sit down next to Waldok with another
drink and hand him a drink. MATT: He takes it and goes, “Thanks!” (hiccup) MARISHA: Holy shit, man. I am so sorry we couldn’t
have been there to protect you from these attackers. MATT: “Attackers? It’s just fucking him.” He
points over at the other guy who’s just like, “Stop rubbing it in. I’m sorry! You fucking jumped
into the middle of my room at night while I was “sleeping. What else am I supposed to do?” He’s
like, “Not stab me, asshole!” MARISHA: Who’s the other guy’s name? MATT: “That’s Zoen.” MARISHA: I’m sorry we couldn’t have been there to
protect you from Zoen. What a dick. I mean, we were here all night fucking trashed, so– If we
had only been there. SAM: The best. MATT: Make a deception check. LIAM: The slow creep on your face, Matt! Come on,
high! MARISHA: 15? Could’ve been better. MATT: Okay, you talk to them, about how you’re sad
you couldn’t have been there. You can see Waldok’s like– MARISHA: We were drunk. Here. MATT: Waldok’s not really caring as much, more
just like, “No, it’s fucking his fault!” and Zoen’s like, “Oversharing?” Caduceus? TALIESIN: I just want to find out what was up from
somebody. MATT: One of the guards is keeping an eye over
there with the torch. He’s like, “Yeah, it looks “like there’s a break-in of some sort; a guy was
stabbed, got him safe. Another man broke his “fucking leg and he’s being taken care of.” TALIESIN: Really? Does he need healing? I can do
that, or otherwise. MATT: “Sure, I guess. This way.” TALIESIN: Yeah, I’ll take care of it real quick. MATT: He brings you over to the dock and you look
over and there’s this guy, you know his name is Bart, he’s one of the deckhands, and he’s over on
the side right now just going (pained groaning) and you can see, it’s snapped. Like, bone
protruded and everything. TRAVIS: Oh, compound! TALIESIN: Oh in that case, Healing Word, level
three. MATT: Okay, you may have to set the bone first. ALL: Woo! MATT: Make a medicine check. TALIESIN: Make a medicine check? SAM: Don’t accidentally turn it to fungus. TALIESIN: Yeah, that’ll do, that’s a 23. LAURA: Oh. TALIESIN: I love this character so much. MATT: You walk up to him and he’s like, “No no no
no!” TALIESIN: It’s all right. MATT: (pained gasp) (relieved gasp) TALIESIN: There you go. MATT: (gasp) He looks down and you can see there’s
a wave of relief on him as he doesn’t have this like protruding fracture. It’s set. Still, you can
see the bone, but it’s much better-looking than it was. TALIESIN: Let’s give him a Cure Wounds level three
just to– MATT: Go for it. TALIESIN: Or, what does he look like, a level two
or a level three to you? MATT: With that medicine check? A level two should
be sufficient. TALIESIN: A level two should be sufficient. All
right. Let’s just take care of this. Can you tell me what happened, son? MATT: “I don’t know. I was up in the crow’s nest
and suddenly it–” TALIESIN: 21. MATT: 21? “Suddenly it’s– oh my god. Thank you!” TALIESIN: While you were up the crow’s nest, what
happened? MATT: “It was catching fire! I was trying to put
it out, but it just kept growing and growing and I “could feel the heat, and it was–” TALIESIN: It looks fine up there. MATT: “I know, I don’t–” TALIESIN: What did you– what was the last 24
hours for you? What did you? MATT: “What do you mean?” TALIESIN: I mean like, I don’t– oh, no. MATT: “What?” TALIESIN: (sighs) I may have left some of the
fruit that we picked up in our last stop in the kitchen. I don’t know what you’ve been eating for
the last– that’s maybe my fault. I really hope it isn’t, but– MATT: Make a deception check. TALIESIN: Seven. MATT: He goes like, “No, I don’t think it’s that.
It was sudden and it was intense, and then it was “gone! It’s fucking crazy.” TALIESIN: I’m going to be worried– I’m going to
check to make sure I’ve got all this, just in case, because that sounds awfully familiar. Do you
need a drink? MATT: “Yeah.” TALIESIN: Come on. We’re going to bring you back,
it’s okay. MATT: (groans) He stands up and like he’s leaning
on you for support, but once he gets to his foot, it’s fine and he’s like, “Oh, man!” TALIESIN: Poor guy. Come on. MATT: All right. You lead him over. TALIESIN: I’m bringing back– I’m going to just
sort of– yeah. Bring him back, and then tell everybody. MATT: Some of the port guard are like going
through the ship now, and they’re going through– TALIESIN: I’m definitely going to tell everyone my
fruit theory, because I’m down a fruit. TRAVIS: Well, shall we, you know, turn in for the
night? Seems like it’s been a crazy one. SAM: Sure has. TALIESIN: I’m tired. LIAM: Charlie Adler concurs. (laughter) TALIESIN: He’s very stern for Charlie Adler. LIAM: No, it’s Caleb. TRAVIS: We’ll all pile into one room before we
separate for the night. MATT: Okay. You all gather into one of the
chambers. MARISHA: We kind of stagger a bit, though. LAURA: Should we look around the room and make
sure nobody can spy on us? Look for peepholes in the room. MARISHA: Look for invisible peoples in the room. MATT: Make a perception check. SAM: I’ll do the same. TRAVIS: Or how about– MARISHA: Fucking fuck! Seven. MATT: Lucky seven! TALIESIN: Don’t you have a spell you can cast that
solves this problem? MATT: The room seems fairly secure. LIAM: That what? Detects a problem? LAURA: That keeps sound in. TRAVIS: What’d you find? SAM: Good stuff. TRAVIS: Oh. Okay. SAM: We got a book. Well, I don’t have it. LAURA: We got a book. Nott found it. SAM: Can any of you read this? TRAVIS: Well, first– MARISHA: I look over his shoulder. MATT: Okay. It has some sketches in it. The
language appears to be some sort of either a cipher or a personal shorthand. What languages do
you know? LIAM: Wherever they are. Celestial, Common,
Sylvan. With my experience tinkering with Comprehend Languages, would I believe this is
something I could–? MATT: Probably, yeah. LIAM: Yeah. All right. I begin casting the ritual
spell. MARISHA: I know Deep Speech. TRAVIS: Was it hidden, where you found it? Should
we detect to see if it has magic anyway, like a trace on it? SAM: It was hidden behind a panel, like a false
panel in the wall. LAURA: Yeah. TALIESIN: If you just bring everything out really
quickly, I’ll cast Detect Magic on there. SAM: Oh, nice! TRAVIS: Yeah, just empty your pockets. Let’s just
make sure nobody’s following this stuff. LIAM: It’ll take me 11 minutes to be able to read
this if I can. TALIESIN: I’ll cast Detect Magic in the meantime. SAM: There’s these jewels, too. LAURA: When we were looking for letters and words
and stuff, we ended up breaking her desk and we stole a bunch of jewels– TRAVIS: That’s not as lo-fi as we were
discussing. LAURA: Well, and then the room filled with poison
and then we put a hole in the floor and we fell. MARISHA: Oh. SAM: Then we caused another guard to stab someone,
and another guard to jump to his death. TRAVIS: We saw them. TALIESIN: Nah, he’s fine. LAURA: Then we jumped in the water and we got
away. MARISHA: That’s pretty awesome. LAURA: The thing is, though, Avantika’s going to
definitely know that somebody stole her stuff. SAM: But we can turn this problem into a
“proble-tunity”, and we can take these jewels that she will definitely know came from her, and plant
them on someone else to just sort of– we could plant them on this Allison person who she doesn’t
like already! MARISHA: She is a bitch. SAM: Or maybe on one of her own crew, and have
them killed. TRAVIS: Yeah, well, isn’t Allison not cool with
Avantika, and the enemy of my enemy is my friend, right? So why would we want to get Allison in
trouble? SAM: Oh. TRAVIS: Yeah. TALIESIN: Oh, wow. SAM: We could plant them on someone that we don’t
like? TRAVIS: Sure. Yeah. LAURA and TRAVIS: But who? SAM: How about Jamedi Cosko? I don’t like that
guy. LAURA: I like Jamedi; I thought he was nice. TRAVIS: Maybe we just hold onto them for now. They
came in containers, right? LAURA: Well, yeah, but– SAM: We don’t want to hold on– LAURA: If we hold on and Avantika’s like “Let’s
everybody empty their pockets” and we have them! SAM: Yeah, these are hot rocks here. TRAVIS: Are they just gems, or are they specific
pieces of jewelry? TALIESIN: We’re literally looking at them right
now, and I Detected Magic before we opened the boxes. MATT: Okay. You open the boxes. They’re a series
of gems, some rougher and probably been scrounged up and found that are with some scrapes, imperfect
but still valuable. Maybe three of them that are still well cut and have not been given any
abrasions. There is a dull green jade necklace that does emit a minor magical essence to it. TALIESIN: That one’s got a little bit of tingle to
it. I’d be worried about that one. Why don’t you take a look at that really quickly? LIAM: Caleb is not listening to anyone. He is
sprinkling pinches of salt and soot in a circle around the book. TALIESIN: That book’s not worth its circle of
salt. SAM: We could destroy these gems and smash them up
into smaller gems. TRAVIS: If you’re going to plant them on anybody,
Vera would be a good candidate. SAM: Vera? Why do you think Vera? TRAVIS: Well, because she’s a bitch. We got to get
her out of here. She’s, you know, wants my job. SAM: Isn’t that just because you stole her job?
That seems like a legitimate beef. LAURA: I think she’s in love with Avantika, too. SAM: How do you know that? LAURA: Because she pulled me aside and she was
like, “I don’t like Fjord and I’ll kill him if you “want me to.” SAM: She said she’s going to kill him?! TALIESIN: Perception check. Insight check. MATT: Make an insight check. Make a deception
check. TALIESIN: I’m pretty low, so what do you got? LAURA: Eight. TALIESIN: 13. MATT: You can tell that she’s lying. LAURA: Okay, so maybe she didn’t say that. But I
still don’t think she likes Fjord very much. SAM: Well then we should roast her. TRAVIS: Yeah, we’re definitely going to plant it
on her. Cause some commotion at the top. Caleb, what do you got? LIAM: (mutters) TRAVIS: Oh, it hasn’t been time. MATT: We’ll say by now, you’ve completed it. LIAM: Well, it’s up to you! MATT: I know. So you can respond. LIAM: (poof) All the soot and salt ignites, and
then suddenly, whoa! What’s it say? MATT: As you go through it, it’s hard to follow
since it’s shorthand, like it’s broken sentences and it’s pieces. They look to be notes from
dreams. MARISHA: Oh, shit. SAM: That could be good stuff. MARISHA: (gasp) Yes, yes it could! TRAVIS: Ooh! MARISHA: It’s got the apricot tree! TRAVIS: Please be an almanac! Sorry. MATT: It goes through discussions of mentions of
Vandren. Mentions of being given the mark. The eye, on her person. After a ritual that was shown
to her by Vandren, the dreams began. The dreams involved this great eye coming to her, with
phrases written down: Provoke. Consume. Learn. Reward. It begins to discuss images that involve
having to fight through dark waters, having to follow signs, being promised power with gifts and
actions that show leadership and drive towards this entity. It spoke about Vandren guiding her,
and then spoke about him getting cold feet. Spoke on him mistrusting the dreams, and his weakness.
It spoke on an attempt to then gift Vandren as a sacrifice, but he got away. LIAM: So Caleb would, seeing this play out as he
reads, would explain it all very carefully, and delicately, because he knows how conflicted a
subject, how charged a subject it would be for Fjord. But does tell everyone in the room
everything. MATT: Then discusses the search for Vandren. For
months and months, to no avail. Eventually changing focus, to instead continue to improve the
joyous boons, and earn the yellow light of the eye. More dreams, with patterns of figures in her
way. People that were close to her, that she felt were barricades, chains that held her back, and
getting rid of them. You’re not entirely certain what “getting rid of them” means, but at least out
of the path. Finding others that begin to also learn of the joys and the promise of ruling the
sea and how, no matter how much Darktow is the center of the Revelry, and the power of the Plank
King, who can possibly not choose to bend the knee to those who control the oceans they sail on. It
then goes on to talk about other notes and scavenged bits, talking about the finding of
Urukaxl. Of the difficulties in hiring people that would go there. The hiring of Jamedi to search out
finally, over time. You find some other notes about another location, from another dream she
had, that involves three land masses of different shapes. There’s a few notes and questions around
it, but one of them is saying, “Archipelago?” Seems to mark these as a possible– SAM: There’s three land masses, right there! MARISHA: Nah. LIAM: She’s cooked. MATT: Then it goes into a few brief phrases about
the newcomers. Discussing how the Mist was taken. It’s not a lot written in this page. SAM: Which one’s her favorite? MATT: All it says is, “I’ve found another chosen.
Perhaps this one will be more useful than Vandren.” SAM: And I fucked him. MATT: It does not say that. That’s where the notes
finish. LIAM: Minor detail: in Caleb’s deciphering of all
the fragments, was there any sense that there was any kind of romantic relationship between Avantika
and Vandren? Or it’s unclear? MATT: It is very unclear. LIAM: Okay. TRAVIS: What language was that in? TALIESIN: What was the necklace, while we’re
here? MATT: It’s a personal cipher. TRAVIS: Oh. LIAM: Yeah, her own cipher. TRAVIS: That’s not great for us. LIAM: That’s not helpful at all. TALIESIN: Well. Really, what’s the necklace before
we go any further to make sure it’s not a come-find-my-shit? LIAM: Which necklace would that be? LAURA: The jade necklace LIAM: First time I’m seeing it, not really but,
just give me ten minutes. TALIESIN: Is there any part in the book that is
actually a cipher for its own. Okay. MATT: Glancing through, it looks like you either
learn it here or whatever it would be used to try to decode it is not present in the book. SAM: I don’t want to say that we’re the best
detectives because that’s already– LAURA: A given. SAM: — established fact. But could this be that
we just got promoted? LAURA: To what? SAM: Commissioner. I don’t know. Could be. We just
cracked the case again. LAURA: Cracked the case. Fjord, are you as crazy
as she is? Because holy shit. LIAM: Here’s the question. Could brainiac Caleb
with this book, which is her own coded cipher, Comprehend Languages with enough time try to study
the recurrence of vowel sounds, consonance sounds, and try to create a key to this book? MATT: You get the sense that this written cipher
is not a verbal language. It is specifically written for her own notes and own purpose. LIAM: Yeah? MATT: So you couldn’t speak it, but if you want to
go ahead and decode it? LIAM: But people break codes– MATT: Yeah, I’m saying you couldn’t. It wouldn’t
be able to–Sorry, I misunderstood. You couldn’t speak it. Go ahead and make an intelligence
check. TALIESIN: It would be amazing if you pulled this
off. LIAM: I’ve rolled shit all night. Every roll. TRAVIS: You’re due one. TALIESIN: But not this one. LIAM: Natural 20! (cheering) MATT: Fuck, dude! Fuck! TRAVIS: Rise, baby, rise! MATT: What does that put you at a total? LIAM: Oh, pretty good. Straight intelligence,
right? MATT: Correct. LIAM: 28. MATT: Intelligence modifier is eight? LIAM: Yeah, it bumped up to 20 when I leveled up. MATT: It would be plus five then. LAURA: Not your saving throw. LIAM: Saving throw, sorry I was looking at the
wrong place. That’s correct. 25. MATT: That is exactly the DC you would have needed
to do this. It is set at a very hard DC. You only could have done this with a 20, you motherfucker. LAURA: You have maxed out intelligence. MATT: Goddamn it, okay! All right! No, here we go!
It’ll take you the better part of the night. You probably won’t sleep which means you won’t get
your spells back. TALIESIN: Take a second to identify the necklace
so we don’t get– SAM: Don’t bother him! TRAVIS: What if the necklace as a trace on it? TALIESIN: Yeah. MATT: It’ll take you the night to complete it. You
will not be able to sleep, which means you won’t get your spells back and you’ll suffer a point of
exhaustion. LIAM: That’s fine. I would like to– Because I was
asking you a question and then suddenly it was happening, right? MATT: I’m just letting you what would take. You
know you can do this. LIAM: Let’s say Caduceus gives Caleb the necklace.
He’ll take ten minutes to figure out what this jade necklace is and spend the night decoding this
book. SAM: Wow. MARISHA: Holy shit. SAM: Best plan ever. TRAVIS: O for six in the series and you crank one
at the bottom of the ninth. MARISHA: You got a book! LIAM: It’s not a book. LAURA: That’s a necklace. LIAM: It’s a necklace. TRAVIS: Oh wow! MARISHA: But you still get a book! MATT: Immediate excitement and disappointment. MARISHA: You still get a book, though! That’s what
I was saying! TALIESIN: Here’s the thing: are we going to remove
the mention of you from the book? LAURA: It doesn’t say the name. LIAM: Just says, “found someone special.” TALIESIN: There’s no way of inferring within the
book– MATT: It doesn’t have the name Fjord. TALIESIN: But it doesn’t connect the newcomers to
the new chosen. MATT: Hmm? TALIESIN: One could not infer that the new chosen
was part of the newcomers from the way she wrote it or no? Is it separated thoughts? MATT: Not necessarily. TALIESIN: All right. Worst-case scenario is we
could mend a page and it will remove the ink if we want to delete anything. LIAM: This is like that around your neck except
it’s specific to warding off poison. No poison. TALIESIN: It’s very helpful. That might be
either– LIAM: It could help any one of us, really. Would
you like it, Nott? SAM: It’s pretty! Oh, but wait. It’s a hot rock. TRAVIS: We’re not keeping anything on our persons.
We need to hide it, bury it. TALIESIN: In the best case scenario, I would say
if we could hide this is someone else’s room underneath their bed. SAM: We could put it in the bag of holding or
whatever. TALIESIN: I would love for these to be in somebody
else’s room. TRAVIS: Uh-huh. You dump that bag out or just go
searching for a necklace, stick your hand it, it comes right out. LAURA: It’ll come right out. LIAM: I say we tie it to a rock and drop the rock
off a specific dock, and maybe we’re lucky and it’s still there later. TRAVIS: Or we could old-school bury it under a
tree, right? Mark it? Same diff. TALIESIN: It’s still going to be findable to
anybody who’s looking for it, though. I would really recommend putting it, I don’t know,
somewhere where we don’t mind it being very specifically found, especially if we’re trying
to– TRAVIS: Frame somebody? TALIESIN: Well, I hate to put it that way, but uh,
I don’t know. This seems– TRAVIS: Well, listen. I am all for putting Vera in
a bad light, right? Avantika is going to want to know who did this. Yeah, Tiff. Old Tiff Fanny.
Might as well put it on her, right? SAM: Do we know where she’s staying, which room
she’s in? TRAVIS: No. LIAM: We have to be able to have someone point the
finger at her, though, because what happens if she finds it herself, later? TALIESIN: That doesn’t matter. It’s still in her
room. LIAM: But if she finds it, she could throw it out.
She could sell it. She could say, I found this in my room. I mean, that’s unpredictable. I mean, we
can’t control that. TRAVIS: No, but, maybe we’re thinking too
small-ball. If you can actually make a translation of that thing, that’s the frame we’ve been looking
for. We take that to the Plank King, we’re going to get all the head start we can get. We know
where the other peach tree is now, so– MARISHA: Mmm-hmm. LAURA: Apricots, Fjord. TRAVIS: It’s apples and peaches, so you know. MARISHA: Between apples and peaches. TALIESIN: We have to make sure that you survive
long enough to get it there. I mean, I wish you’d just grabbed the book. That would make life more
easy. LAURA: If– I know, we shouldn’t have grabbed
everything. SAM: What, the jewels? We can just throw them in
the ocean. LAURA: We could just throw them in the ocean. TRAVIS: Yeah. SAM: We could snoop– We could wait until we see
Vera at breakfast tomorrow and just– Right? She’s staying here. TRAVIS: Yeah, I think it’s too dangerous to try
and plant it on her. It’s adding one step that we don’t need. MARISHA: I agree with that. TRAVIS: I think we take it, once you’re
finished– LIAM: This is the key. Anything else is a
distraction, can only cause wrinkles, so we ditch it. Maybe somewhere where it can be found again,
but it is not as important as this book is. So, we solve this, and her goose is cooked. MARISHA: Yeah. TRAVIS: Yeah. I agree. SAM: Except if we bring this to the Plank King,
it’s admitting that we broke into the ship and stole it. MARISHA: We don’t need to take that to the Plank
King if Caleb knows the language. TALIESIN: Yeah, we do. LIAM: We do, though. SAM: We do. MARISHA: Why? She could ford anything that we
want– Forge. She could forge– TALIESIN: We still need to prove the book. SAM: We still need proof that this came from her,
that she wrote this. MARISHA: We have her signature, let’s forge it. SAM: But that’s fake. TALIESIN: That’s too much. I feel like we can take
the book to him. I think if we say that we knew about the plot, we suspected, and were looking for
proof– SAM: Yeah. That’s good, I like that. LIAM: I have a question for the group, because I
don’t remember. Did Beauregard share with the group that she got tapped by the Plank King? SAM: She would’ve shared that, right? MARISHA: I probably would have. Yeah. MATT: Well, now would be the time to share it if
you hadn’t. MARISHA: So by the way, I got tapped on the
shoulder by the Plank King. He’s looking for dirt on Avantika. SAM: What!? MARISHA: I know. Totally mind-blowing. I know you
had no clue. TRAVIS: I don’t think it does, right? As Beau has
appropriately stated many times, snitches get stitches. If we walk that in there, the Plank King
might just be looking for disloyal motherfuckers to hang up by their toes. We need to find a way to
either message that, to send via messenger with the book and a codex that you’ve created, and let
him be able to see the evidence for himself. SAM: We could drop it in Allison’s mailbox and
say, hey, here’s all the proof you need to destroy Avantika. MARISHA: I don’t think we need to do that. I think
we just drop it in the Plank King’s– TRAVIS: We’re assuming that she wants to destroy
her. SAM: Well, did you see the way they looked at each
other? TRAVIS: Yeah, maybe they need to (yowl) get it on,
you know? LIAM: Maybe we send Frumpkin with this stuff in
tow, to his little perch with a note. An anonymous note. LAURA: Yeah. I like it. MARISHA: I think we copy the contents of the
book. TALIESIN: We have a copy of the contents of the
book. LAURA: Caleb’s brain. MARISHA: That’s what I’m saying, we copy the
contents of the book. TRAVIS: A physical copy or up in the dome? LIAM: I have a copy. In my noodle. MARISHA: Sure, as long as you think it’ll last
there. LIAM: Ja, I can write it down. MARISHA: I will say, the Plank King offered me
some good cash to rat out Avantika. SAM: Yeah, he was asking for a snitch. MARISHA: He was literally asking for a snitch.
Now– TRAVIS: True. SAM: That seems legit. That seems legit and
honest. He was making an honest– Right? Did you get the honest vibe from Plankie? MARISHA: No. Nothing about any of these people is
honest. TALIESIN: I think he’d kill both of them. I think
sending it with– Just sending it to him and just giving it to him– LIAM: Well, it could be an anonymous note. Or we
could send Frumpkin once we leave here, and you could sign it, from Beauregard. TALIESIN: I would almost say, if we could give him
the whole kit and kaboodle, everything that was stolen, top to bottom, with a note saying this is
the full– MARISHA: I know what to sign. LIAM: Spill it, girl. Spill it. MARISHA: Just write it up, and I’ll sign it. SAM: Ooh, who knows what it’ll be. TRAVIS: What? SAM: She’s keeping us in suspense. MARISHA: I’ll simply sign it with: How much? TRAVIS: To go with the package? MARISHA: To go with the package. LIAM: To go with this, once I have deciphered it
for them. MARISHA: Mm-hmm. Unless we want zero
implications– TRAVIS: Yeah, that swings back to us a little
bit. TALIESIN: I say translate the one page, give the
cipher so that they can figure it out on their own. Let’s give the whole thing to him, just all
the jewels, all the box, the whole thing top to bottom. LIAM: Avantika’s coming for your throat. This is
the evidence, do with it what you will. We go to the pomegranate tree. TRAVIS: Yes. Yeah. I don’t know how we get out of
here, but we’re going to try. MARISHA: We need the Mist. TALIESIN: We’ll be fine. TRAVIS: Well, we need to wait until they apprehend
her. SAM: Then we can take her boat. TALIESIN: Then we can take our boat. TRAVIS: We do something. LIAM: We could also add to this note that Frumpkin
delivers that Avantika– Here is your proof that Avantika wants your throat; the whole crew is
complicit. LAURA: We’re part of the crew. TRAVIS: Oh boy. You know– Okay. Just throwing it
out there, big picture, okay, because there are two goals on that map. One is the peach, the other
is the peach tree. If we go to one and she goes to the other, and let’s say she gets deferred
adjudication and gets out just a little bit after us, she might be waiting for us at one or the
other. I’m just saying. SAM: But then we’ll face her head on. TALIESIN: Let’s let them make any insinuations
they want. The crew will fall the way they will. Again, I think giving too much is too much. The
guy’s itching for a reason to get rid of her. Let’s give him what he wants. No conditions, no
terms. Nothing. TRAVIS: Let’s just do that. Let’s let Caleb do his
thing, and we’ll see what the morning does. Where are we keeping the gems and everything else in the
meantime? TALIESIN: In the safe, maybe. SAM: Just one– One other consideration. TRAVIS: The lead safe? Do we still have that? In
the bag? MATT: Well, the safe in the bag you still have,
yeah. SAM: One other consideration, just throwing it out
there. We’re all spitballing here, right? LAURA: Big lead safe, not in the bag. MATT: The big one you ordered, yeah, that wouldn’t
have gone in there. LAURA: But the little box that we have the thing
in, yeah. MATT: Yeah. SAM: You know that page that you were telling us
about that says, the three land masses might be the Grand Archipelago? Maybe, when you’re
translating, that becomes four land masses and a different place? TALIESIN: We’re not going to translate the whole
book, just one page. TRAVIS: No, if she gets the book back– TALIESIN: Well, how is she going to get the book
back? TRAVIS: We do have the lead safe. The
Dodecahedron’s in it. SAM: We’re going to translate one page? LIAM: No, here’s the thing. If we just give them a
page– SAM: No, it’s got to be the whole book. MARISHA: No, no, no. He’s saying we send a cipher
and a translated page with the entire book. TALIESIN: Does that make sense? MARISHA: So that they can then take the time with
their smart people to translate the rest of the book. TALIESIN: He’s making the cipher. MARISHA: No, he knows the cipher. LAURA: Oh no, it’s getting late. I’m getting
confused. LIAM: I am going to make a cipher that can be used
to decode this book. If we send a cipher and the book, they can take time to read the entire
thing. MARISHA: Correct. TALIESIN: Let’s rip a few pages out. LIAM: Hmm. MARISHA: They’ll be able to tell, unless we do
Jester’s hint, where we Mend a few pages and get rid of some ink. SAM: I would Mend the page that has the thing
about where the peach tree is. MARISHA: So let’s just do that, and the rest of
the plan stays the same. TRAVIS: Yeah. Make it so. LIAM: Ja, that’s good. MARISHA: Break! LIAM: But we’ll leave immediately. SAM: We are so good at this! TRAVIS: Well, once she’s apprehended. LIAM: Correct. TRAVIS: Yeah, okay. We’ll send some food and water
up your way. LIAM: Ja. Goodnight. MATT: All right, so who’s holding what? TRAVIS: The jewels in the containers go in the
lead safe. SAM: Where does that go? TRAVIS: In the Bag of Holding. MATT: Okay. LIAM: I take out the silver thread first. MATT: All right. SAM: Are we all staying in this room tonight? TALIESIN: No. I’m going to my room. TRAVIS: Is it stupid to be literally down the hall
decoding this journal all night from where Avantika’s staying? LAURA: Too late. SAM: Well, we’ve got the silver thread up. She
can’t get in. TRAVIS: It’s just a warning system, right? It
doesn’t keep her out. TALIESIN: It’ll wake us up, though. MARISHA: It’ll wake us up. So who’s guarding
Caleb? SAM and MARISHA: I’ll guard Caleb. TRAVIS: So will Yasha. MATT: All right, so you guys will take sleeping
shifts. MARISHA: Yeah. MATT: Mark yourself with one point of
exhaustion, Caleb. You don’t recover spells. The rest of you get a full rest. LIAM: I only used one. SAM and MARISHA: That’s good. TALIESIN: Oh, new spells. SAM: I attack Fjord, sneak attack damage! Pretty
good. (knocking) MARISHA: What’s that? Where is that? (knocking continues) MATT: To each of your doors, shortly after
sunrise. SAM: Oh. What’s Caleb up to? MATT: He’s just finishing making most of the
cipher. SAM: Hide that shit, hide that shit! Hide that
shit! MATT: All right, so you have to have the book to
make the cipher. So you go ahead and go find Jester? Are you guys in the same room? LAURA: I was sleeping in the room. LIAM: I wasn’t working on the book and the cipher
all at once, all through the night? MATT: That would’ve been– That’s the process that
happened. LIAM: That’s what I’m saying, yeah. MATT: You hand it to Jester to go ahead and hide? LIAM: Ja. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. LAURA: Is there anything in the room that seems
like it could be hollow or anything? MATT: How so? LAURA: I’m looking for somewhere that I can put a
hole in it, hide the jewels in there, and then Mend it so that it won’t look like anything ever
touched it. But I’ll know where they are. MATT: Make an investigation check. This would be
perception, I guess. TALIESIN: I thought– Okay, we’re– Okay, new
plan. Sure. LAURA: Do I get advantage still, if this was last
night? MATT: No, it only lasts for an hour. LAURA: Okay. 13. MATT: 13. Looking around, no. The room is shoddy
in some ways, but it doesn’t have large holes you can hide gems in. SAM: It’s in the haversack. It’s okay. LAURA: Yeah, but if I get searched– TRAVIS: It’s in the safe, right? TALIESIN: It’s in the safe. LAURA: Yeah. TRAVIS: Lead should block it. LAURA: Yeah, and you don’t think she’s going to
go, “Open this safe?” SAM: She can’t pull the safe unless she knows it’s
in there. LAURA: If she turns the bag over and empties it
out, everything comes out. TALIESIN: That’s not true. TRAVIS: Yes it is. LAURA: If you turn the bag inside out– TALIESIN: Everything comes out? TRAVIS: Yep. LAURA: Okay. Okay. This was last night. I was
looking for a place to hide. MATT: A voice comes to the room and goes, “Hey!
Wake up!” TALIESIN: What’s going on, man? Hey. Good
morning. LAURA: What? TRAVIS: Caduceus and I will open the door to our
room. MATT: All right. You see Bouldergut out there with
one of the guards and Willow Whisk, who’s the cook. Jeremiah, who’s rubbing his eyes. Bouldergut
goes, “All hands on deck.” TRAVIS: Now? MATT: “Company meeting.” TRAVIS: Yeah, sure. Let us get our shit together. TALIESIN: I’ll go get dressed. MATT: “Now.” TRAVIS: Okay. TALIESIN: I’ll grab my stuff. TRAVIS: Grabbing our stuff. MATT: Goes to the next door, says the same thing
through the doorway. SAM: Hello? MATT: “All hands on deck! Company meeting!” SAM: On the deck of the ship? MATT: “Yeah. Yes.” SAM: All right. Aye aye. We’ll see you there in,
what, a couple hours? MATT: Pets you on the head a little bit. SAM: That’s fine. MATT: “Eh heh heh.” Goes to every room and says
the same deal. MARISHA: Okay, what are we going to do? LAURA: What does the hallway look like that all
the rooms are in? MATT: It’s a long hallway; series of chambers,
most of the doors closed. Looks to be four and four, and there’s a stairway that leads up to a
third level. SAM: Want me to throw it on the roof? MARISHA: Can we send Frumpkin now with the
package? Just send him now, out the window. LIAM: Right this very minute, he’s a one-ounce
owl. SAM: He needs to change. TALIESIN: How long does that take? LIAM: Ten minutes. SAM: We’ve got ten minutes. MARISHA: Go! Go. Go, go, go. LIAM: Stall for me. SAM: What about the jewels? Should we get rid of
the jewels? TALIESIN: The whole thing. MARISHA: Send it with the book. MATT: The next minute goes by, and two more
figures show up and they go, “We’re going to the “ship now, gather your things. There’s no more
waiting. Come on.” LAURA: Okay, okay. SAM: We’ll do it on the way. LAURA: I have to get dressed, that’s all. That’s
the thing MATT: You get a sense from the vocality here that
things are not right. Probably relating to events that transpired through the evening. MARISHA: Gee, I wonder. LAURA: Okay. TRAVIS: You could just pop out of the room and
meet us on the way. SAM: Well yeah, they’re not in the room. Do you
want to pop out of the room? TALIESIN: Pop out of the room that– TRAVIS: No, I mean Jester pops out of the room
with the bag and leave it somewhere, then meet us on the way to the ship. SAM: Oh that. The haversack? TRAVIS: Dimension door the fuck out of the room. SAM: Well what are we doing with the book and
stuff? TRAVIS: Not now. MATT: By the way, all of your doors now are being
held open and they’re expectantly waiting. The crew doesn’t trust you, and they haven’t really
since you’ve been here. They’re not like, “Cool, “guys, let’s go!” There’s very much a, “We’re
getting everybody in there and shit, there’s going “to be conversations.” TRAVIS: There’s no time. We’re going down. MATT: You gather your things, head outside.
Bouldergut’s keeping a watch from behind. Other members of the crew are being gathered and ushered
in, as well as the crew from the Mistake and Orly. Everyone’s being brought over towards the docks. SAM: Do you want me to sleight of hand throw the
bag down an alley as we walk? LAURA: The whole bag? SAM: Sure. TALIESIN: Oof. SAM: Got to get rid of it. TRAVIS: No! SAM: We’ve gotta get rid of it! TRAVIS: No. I’d rather fight over it than lose a
check, just going like, “Uh!” SAM: I’m super fast. TRAVIS: All right. Do what you’re going to do. LAURA: I don’t want to lose the whole haversack. TRAVIS: Do what you’ve got to do. LAURA: I do not want to lose the whole haversack.
Nope. It’s got the Dodecahedron in it. SAM: Just toss it, and then we’ll come back for
it. Behind a dumpster. LAURA: Nope! TALIESIN. No. MATT: You guys at this point have been brought to
the docks now, and you’re being pushed toward the direction– You can see the Squalleater there
waiting, and there a number of figures already on deck. LAURA: Is there ever a moment it looks like
nobody’s looking at us, or me? MATT: Make a perception check. LAURA: No. Seven. MATT: You don’t know. You don’t see anybody,
necessarily. You have Bouldergut walking behind you, and other people are being ushered in. LAURA: Can I fall back and talk to Bouldergut? MATT: Sure. LAURA: Bouldergut, what is going on right now? MATT: “I don’t know. I wanted to sleep longer.” LAURA: Me too! Everybody seems so angry at
everybody else. Look at the ship right now! It looks crazy, all these people walking around. MATT: “I know, I want to just eat breakfast.” LAURA: Me too! While I’m talking to her and
hopefully when I point at the ship– Does she look where I point? MATT: Make a persuasion check. SAM: Look, it’s a space shuttle. LIAM: Dumb as a brick. LAURA: 22. MATT: Yeah, just follows your eyeline over. LAURA: I reach in the bag and I pull out the
jewels and I dump them off the side. I want them to fall in the water as we’re walking. MATT: Okay, so all the jewels (bubble noises) into
the water. Okay. Make a sleight of hand check. LAURA: (singing) I wish I had looked at the
Dodecahedron this morning. (normal voice) 15? MATT: 15? Okay. You drop them off the side. As far
as you’re concerned, no one noticed. TRAVIS: Who else was walking with us besides
Bouldergut? LAURA: Bouldergut was in the back, though. MATT: Bouldergut was in the back, and there were a
few other– First off, you have Waldok, Zoen are with you guys. Bark you see being brought over
from another side as well. It looks like he either stayed somewhere else or was somewhere else when
he was gathered up by the crew and the guard. The guard only– None of them go on the ship, but they
lead you over to the edge of the dock and watch you all go onto the deck and begin to walk away. SAM: Where’s the book right now? LIAM: It’s in Caleb’s possession isn’t it? SAM: Yeah. MARISHA: Oh my god. MATT: Okay. You guys walk along the plank up onto
the deck and there you see Avantika, Vera, the rest of the crew, are all there. You can see the
crew of the Mistake are brought to the edge of the dock, and are held there, waiting. You guys are
brought up on there. MARISHA: Where’s the Mistake? MATT: You don’t know where the Mistake is docked.
You didn’t see it when you came in. There are probably 20-plus ships that are all across the
docks here. As you guys are brought to the edge of the ship– TRAVIS: I am burning so many calories right now. MARISHA: I’m dying. I’ve never felt more in
trouble. SAM: We’ve got to get this book off the fucking
boat! MATT: Well, you’re on the deck right now. TRAVIS: That’s the most sure way to get it seen. MATT: The deck of the Squalleater. Avantika sees
you approach and goes, “Good morning, everyone! “Good morning. Well, I apologize for the problems.
This should only take a moment to discuss. It “appears we’ve a bit of an incident overnight, and
I wanted to let everyone know there may have been “some issues rifling through. Over here, Waldok was
so unfortunately shivved by one of our “compatriots,” and shoots a glare over at Zoen,
who’s like, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry.” “But it has “come to our attention that there has also been…
Well, to be perfectly honest, a break-in to my “personal chambers.” MARISHA: (gasp) MATT: “I know. Some of my personal belongings have
gone missing, and I wanted to ask if anybody has “seen anything throughout the night. I already
spoke with a few of the crew who were here before. “I have not spoken with you, Waldok. Did you see
anything?” Waldok goes, “I was sleeping, and “suddenly this piece of shit fell through the
ceiling, and landed on top of me, and I was “just–” It was the other way around. Waldok got
stabbed. So Waldok goes, “I was walking, and I “heard some noise inside your chambers. I went to
inspect it, unlocked the door, went in, and things “seemed fine, but then I fell through the fucking
floor, onto Zoen, and he was sitting in bed “sleeping, and he just fucking started stabbing
me!” Zoen’s like, “You woke me up, what am I “supposed to do?! And where the fuck are we?”
“Anyway, we looked at the floor, and somebody had “broken the floor, probably snuck in somehow.” The
captain goes, “Thank you for that. Also, it “appears that Bark here had strange delusions and
fell. Or leapt, apparently, from the crow’s nest. “Did you see anything in particular?” He’s like, “I
mean, it was crazy! It caught fire, and then I “jumped to get away from it, and there was no
fire.” She goes, “So it appears that there may “have been some sort of distraction. Well, has
anybody else seen anything of particular interest “last night? And by the way, Caduceus, I heard that
you were very helpful in helping our compatriots “with their wounds.” TALIESIN: Yeah, it was no problem. MATT: “I appreciate you being a team player.” TALIESIN: Well, it looked– That leg was pretty
rough. Hmm. TRAVIS: Is this a frequent occurrence when you’re
in Darktow? This sort of– MATT: “Oh, certainly not. To be perfectly honest,
whoever did this does not understand the rules of “the city very well.” TALIESIN: I can– No. I can find creatures. I
can’t find objects. MATT: “Hmm. Vera?” Vera’s sitting back there and
nods. You see her fingers trace this weird symbol in the air that leaves a slight trace. Her eyes
flare for a second and she goes, “But that is “okay. Because I can.” LIAM: I take a bit of phosphorus and squelch it
through my hand and cast Wall of Fire across the entire length of the boat between them and us. TRAVIS: Oh. MARISHA: Holy shit. MATT: That’s where we’re going to pick up next
week. (screaming) MARISHA: The gauntlet has been thrown! LAURA: Oh my god! LIAM: I’m sweating. MATT: Next week we pick up in the shipyard of
Darktow, on the deck– MARISHA: Not next week! MATT: Sorry, in two weeks– (screaming) MATT: Oh my god, in two weeks! Oh, no! Curse you,
Thanksgiving! On the deck of the Squalleater! LIAM: Like the salt on the rim of a margarita,
phosphorus through my hand. SAM: It’s worth its weight in salt? MARISHA: Eyy. LAURA Ho-ly dang. I should have kept those
jewels! SAM: Flawless plan, executed flawlessly. MATT: It was a pretty good plan. There were just a
couple of loose ends! LIAM: We should have worked out Frumpkin in
advance. MARISHA and LAURA: Yeah. LIAM: I thought we’d have time in the morning. MATT: There were a few moments to possibly discard
a couple of key objects. MARISHA: But we got the information we needed! MATT: This is good, but you got the information
you needed, and this is going to be a hell of a start to the next session! Oh, man! I wasn’t
expecting it to go this way! MARISHA: Info is golden. MATT: All right, we’ll pick up here in a couple of
weeks. We’re sad we won’t see you guys next week for Thanksgiving. What do we have going on over
Thanksgiving? MARISHA: Well the day after Thanksgiving on Friday
is Honey Heist 3: Tova’s Honeys. MATT: There we go. We’re sad we’ll be missing you
on Thursday, but on Friday we do have that awesome. MARISHA: On Friday, watch us as bears? Stealing
honey instead of very invaluable books and jewels? TALIESIN: It can only go better. SAM: (singing) It can only be better. MATT: Oh man. My heart’s pumping. LIAM: The last ten minutes have been like, “Don’t
cast it. Just wait. Just wait. Just wait. Okay.” MARISHA: It felt like getting called into the
principal’s office. You’re like, “Fuck.” LAURA: Yeah. And like, a principal that always
knows when you’re lying. MARISHA and LIAM: Yes. TALIESIN: We have video, man. I didn’t do it. MATT: Well, see you guys in a couple of weeks to
pick up from this crazy moment. Until then, thank you, we love you very much, and is it Thursday
yet? Goodnight, guys. TRAVIS: We’re going to war! [music]

About the Author: Michael Flood


  1. I'm so glad this is back. I just started a few weeks ago and have been watching it all the time and I couldn't wait to watch more and I got stopped here

  2. I fell a pretty bad for the people that will rush the campaign here and will not see the commentaries in the original vids 🙁

  3. Jesus you could see how every passing minute the tension rose and rose until it hit the crescendo at the end. I feel like the reoccurring theme in this campaign is the mighty nein doubles down on everything they do until they bust and you end of having to do something drastic…like steal and ship and become pirates

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